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The Problem with John Walker and Fandom

This is an intervention, y’all.

Because we need to talk about John Walker and his “fandom” real quick.

Buckle up.

Disclaimer: I’m going to spoil the events of Captain America and the Winter Soldier, The Falcon and the Winter Soldier, Black Widow, Thunderbolts, and Captain America: Brave New World, so if you’re not caught up and you want to go in unspoiled, please bookmark this post and circle back once you’ve seen the missing works I’ll be discussing below.

Also, warning for language. Lots of it. Some of y’all been driving me crazy for the last three months and I’m finally addressing it today.

Now, I know I’m speaking to a somewhat limited audience, but I feel compelled to take an aside to address something that’s been bothering me intensely since the release of Marvel’s Thunderbolts this past summer. It was a film I didn’t want to watch, but I did since my grumpy cyborg husband was cast in a supporting role, so I went. It was fine for me. No more, no less, just fine.

But that’s not how other people reacted.

After I got out of the movie, I pretty much left it with very shallow impressions. For one, it feels…slightly gratuitous when you think about what was actually accomplished and established within the film, so I was already going into it knowing it’s not pointless, but it is pointless-adjacent. It doesn’t really do much but slightly advance the progression of Yelena and Red Guardian—pre-established characters that we at least know after watching Black Widow—and an inching forward for Bob (newly introduced) and Bucky. Ghost gets zero development and neither does Taskmaster since she gets shot in the fucking face in the first ten minutes (and do NOT get me started on that or you’ll hear a rant for another hour). All in all, it just moved Valentina into supervillain position when she’s already a boring, middling antagonist taking up space and it didn’t do much but tell us they cobbled together the worst “Avengers” team I’ve ever seen in my life. And that’s not because I dislike any of them other than Walker—they had trouble with one concrete wall, guys. One. Concrete. Wall. And you expect me to think they can save the world? Mmkay. “Sure, Jan.”

But the thing is…apparently, the fandom’s reaction was the opposite. I get home after the movie and find everyone on Tumblr singing its praises about how good it is. And that’s fine, but it’s also confusing and problematic as hell.

And that’s what I want to talk about today.

It’s no secret most fandom spaces are still majority white. Anyone not white that’s been in fandom for more than maybe a year or two is also painfully aware that most fandom spaces are still majority white, so we have to watch what we say and how we say it. So most of the time, I’m not participating; I’m just lurking, as I know as the resident fandom and film snob, most of the content is going to annoy me. I curate my time in fandom very strictly because I know how problematic it can get and I try my best to filter out the noise I don’t want and just find the cool folks and hang out with them.

In particular, one of the best most recent fandom moments I had was live-tweeting the Falcon and the Winter Soldier mini-series. You see, back in the year of our Lord 2021, we weren’t yet dealing with the total collapse of America, just the partial collapse of America, and so I was still using Twitter and live-tweeting during the show’s debut, and it was fantastic. It remains the best show for me personally of all the Marvel shows (though I enjoyed the heck out of Echo, Moon Knight, and Ms. Marvel) since for me, it was the first time that Marvel Studios actively felt like taking a stance on an issue of not only race, but the discussion about justice versus vengeance. It wasn’t that Marvel had never taken one at all; this, to me, was the first time Marvel overtly said that bigotry, racism, and prejudice are just as rampant in the MCU as it is in the real world, and burying your head in the sand or becoming too cynical to help is not going to make things better for anyone nor you. It openly discussed things like microaggressions, double standards, and the trouble with mental health among veterans with PTSD. To me, it was a wonderfully balanced and excellent show that could make me laugh as much as it could make me cry, and the fact that the antagonist was a sympathetic woman of color used and manipulated by an evil, entitled white bitch was thematically on point for me. (Rot in hell, Sharon Carter. We know you’ll never get what’s coming to you. You suck.)

I remember when John Walker’s Baron von Underbite ass first showed his face on the Falcon and the Winter Soldier. As intended, he was met with instant hatred and ridicule, and that was always the intention for him. Everything about him is problematic as a creative choice to talk about what a fucking problem America has with patriotism. The MCU America was just so fucking desperate to elevate a white man in the absence of Steve Rogers that they picked the worst possible candidate and put lipstick on a pig to pass this bum off as Captain America, as if that title is just a shield that anyone can hold. Hell to the naw, bruh. That’s not Captain America. That’s Captain Colonizer, as the brilliant Nicque Marina called him during her absolutely fantastic series of FATWS skits on TikTok and Instagram. When John Walker premiered, he was the laughingstock of the Internet, generating an avalanche of hilarious memes, and it was a great time to be alive because almost everyone was on the same page: “This guy is a wannabe government stooge that’s not fit to wipe Steve Rogers’ ass and we’re going to talk about why this entire thing is a sham.” The best thing I ever heard regarding it is that John Walker is who America really is, Steve Rogers is who America thinks it is, and Sam Wilson is who America should be. I agree 100%.

But here’s the thing.

While John Walker is certainly just a lightning rod for your hatred as the antagonist of the show, he’s also written very well as a problematic white man that thinks he’s the solution to America’s problems. They don’t just dump him out there as a one-dimensional bully like Ronan from Guardians of the Galaxy. The writing for the show is excellent, so they do cast a slightly sympathetic edge to Walker in that he goes so gung-ho about being Captain America that he crosses the damn line and murders an innocent man (and please note, innocent of the crime of murdering Lemar, not innocent in general; the guy was an ecoterrorist responsible for the deaths of others, so again, innocent of this particular crime is what I’m talking about there) and then acts shocked he’s then demoted and the title is rescinded.

What I also found very well done was the fact that it’s very clear Walker did not receive a redemption arc in canon. He is meant to be seen as a problematic person who thinks that his station in the military means he doesn’t have to listen, reason, understand, or sympathize. John Walker is a weapon made by our own rotten government who abuses his power to get what he wants and make demands to others he has no right to make. We see he is a lying coward when he confronts Lemar’s grieving family and he is so convinced he’s a good soldier that he keeps carrying around a flimsy shield to relive his glory days (aka five minutes) when he was Captain America. Like a lot of white men in America, he is obsessed with wearing rose-colored glasses about his tenure as “Cap” instead of learning from the experience and becoming a better person. This fact is evidenced in Thunderbolts when it’s revealed Walker became full on emotionally (and possibly physically) abusive to his black wife and biracial son, screaming at her when she asks him to properly watch over their son while he’s in the middle of brooding about his failed attempt to be Captain America.

Remember this part. This part is important for later.

The Falcon and the Winter Soldier remains a well-regarded show to this very day, and I still reference it frequently, as do other people, and so time went on and then they introduced what Captain America: Brave New World would be about, which is Sam adopting the mantle and taking his rightful place as Captain America in an America that would see him hang. I’m going to try my best not to slide into my rant about everyone’s lack of support for Cap 4, but I do need to talk about it so you can understand why I’m even writing this post to begin with.

I loved Captain America: Brave New World, and I am livid that everyone made a concerted effort to make it the least amount of money possible for downright hypocritical reasons. But that’s not what I want to talk about today, if ever. I left the theater ecstatic, knowing the movie certainly had issues, but overall, it left me feeling so warm and encouraged because the message that I took from it was, “Even in the midst of a corrupt government that is oppressing its own people, if you have the ability to stand up to protect innocent people, it is the responsible thing to do to still save them in spite of the system itself being utterly corrupt and horrid.” That movie was not about patriotism, and I’m sick of every last person that said as much, as I feel like we ain’t watch the same fucking movie. There are several lines that directly address the moral quandary of being a black Captain America in a corrupt ass America. Sam knows that Ross is a sack of shit that ain’t gonna change, but that doesn’t mean he should stop helping to save people in harm’s way thanks to Ross’ shitty ass agenda. He goes out of his way to be merciful and understanding when needed, but also beat dat ass when it’s necessary (that fuckin’ dropkick impregnated me, it was so fuckin’ dope) and not shy away from the fact that Sam was trying to exonerate Isaiah Bradley the same way Steve was trying to exonerate Bucky when Zemo framed Bucky for King T’Chaka’s murder. And yet the response to Sam trying to save his friend was totally different from how Steve was treated, and his movie was also treated differently by a fandom that whines all day long about the mistreatment of black characters, but yet it abandons them at the first sign of trouble or even just plain dislike. Everyone found every single excuse as to why they didn’t see Cap 4, and I don’t think that’s an accident.

But here’s my point: why is it that Sam Wilson, no matter how much he sacrifices and no matter how good he tries to be, is not good enough for the MCU fandom…and yet after Thunderbolts, John Walker’s a “Woobie blorbo” that I should accept as just a “misunderstood misfit”?

And try to read between the lines here.

Why is a dark-skinned black man from New Orleans who worked his ass off and is a genuinely good person now considered second fiddle to a literal abusive white supremacist sociopath?

Gee.

I wonder why, fandom.

I wonder why.

Let’s circle back to what I talked about earlier. I got back from Thunderbolts, posted that it was mediocre, and went about my life. While I did not particularly care about it, I did like some of Bucky’s scenes (look, I’m just a squirrel tryin’ to get a nut, SO WHAT’S UP SEBASTIAN STAN?!) and so I basically marked a tag on Tumblr so that I could check each day to see when Bucky’s scenes from the movie would be in .gif form in high quality.

And a byproduct of my thirsty ass doing that means unfortunately, I saw in real time when the tide turned of the white half of the fandom now infantilizing and de-demonizing John fucking Walker after his appearance in Thunderbolts.

And I’m still so angry I cannot even express myself.

Look, let’s stop for a second before you twist your face up at me. I’m not talking about liking problematic characters. Bitch, please—if I threw that stone, my entire house would come crashing down. I love Loki, and that motherfucker is the most problematic demigod we have in the MCU, so I’m not talking about simply liking someone that’s either bad or unforgivable. What I’m talking about is how this fandom is content to forgive John Walker of all his crimes when he has not done one single thing that indicates he is worthy of being forgiven, and how the same white fans that praise Walker and say we should forgive him too spend every single second tearing down Sam Wilson and giving him no sympathy and no credit for anything he’s ever done, all while still moaning that they miss Steve Rogers.

Fandom doesn’t care who hears them bleating.

But guess what, white fandom?

People of color hear you and see you doing this shit. Yes, we listen. Yes, we remember.

This is some fucked up behavior and I’m tired of pretending it’s not.

I’m not even going to ask how you can reach inside yourself and sympathize with John Walker over Sam Wilson because I don’t know you as a person. What I’m talking about is how it’s ridiculous to heap praise onto an outright abusive white man that in no way is portrayed in a positive light—even to the degree that everyone in canon ridicules him for being a bossy, arrogant, slimy, selfish jerk—no reason other than you desperately need an excuse not to accept Sam Wilson as Captain America. It is perfectly fine to not like Sam Wilson nor Anthony Mackie. It is perfectly fine to not like Captain America: Brave New World. This is about the fact that y’all don’t want to face your own prejudices when you make these long posts about how we should feel sorry for Walker, and yet you can’t ever drum up sympathy for anything Sam’s been put through since his introduction in Captain America: The Winter Soldier. You need to understand that we hear this crap and it makes us never want to interact with fandom again when the hypocrisy is on full display the way it is in the MCU fandom, to the degree I no longer track MCU tags and have to block John Walker x Reader fics (yes, those are fucking real, and do not get me fucking started) in the Bucky Barnes gif tag where I just want to look at my grumpy cyborg husband in peace. I have to now dodge post after fucking post insisting John Walker is a poor misunderstood soul, not a violent criminal who was willing to ditch everyone to save himself.    

Do you see the picture forming yet?

What I am really asking you is: why, as a black fangirl, am I told to forgive and accept John Walker when the fandom is not even remotely willing to accept any part of Sam Wilson?

Let that sit with you for a second. Does it make you uncomfortable? It fucking should. Again, this is not about “Sam is better/likable.” I am talking about a double standard in which a white antagonist is seen by this fandom as more sympathetic than a black protagonist that has sacrificed literal life and limb for the very same world, yet he’s just insulted non-stop by that same fandom. No one is asking you not to sympathize with Walker—he is a character written well enough that there is an angle in which you can find something to feel sorry for him about. My problem is that no matter what good Sam does, these same people reject him but accept Walker’s unapologetically awful behavior no questions asked.  

And I am the one saying this behavior should be called out more in fandom spaces. Not silenced and ignored and buried.

Like who you like. No one will ever stop you.

But you also need to pay attention to hidden biases and ugly behaviors that are toxic and indicative of a much larger psychological problem.

Again, this is not to say I don’t have those same biases. Of course I do. We all do. I try my best to dig inside myself and follow the thread about why I feel strongly about something and then stay aware that I can accidentally be problematic by not following the thread to its origin. I’m sure many other people do the same. All I am saying is we need to pay attention to problematic behavior in majority white fandom spaces instead of burying our heads in the sand. It’s hard for POC to find community when that sort of attitude is stinking up the joint. And fandom is meant to be shared among everyone, not a select few, and certainly not by perpetuating unhealthy reactions to characters based on their race.  

For God’s sake, just look at Bucky’s fucking face when you leave him with a bunch of problematic white people.

LOOK WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOU DON’T LEAVE UNCLE BUCKY WITH AUNT SARAH AND HIS CHILDREN IN NEW ORLEANS HE IS SO TIRED BEING AROUND OTHER WHITE PEOPLE IF YOU DON’T LET THIS POOR MAN FUCKING REST AND BE WITH THE BLACK PEOPLE HE WANTS TO BE AROUND OOH I SWEAR FO’ GOD MARVEL—

Ahem. Sorry, lost the thread there, I’m done.

Look, all I want is for us to all row this boat together instead of squabbling about where the shit is going, okay? Just think before you post. Think about why you have all these problems with Sam, yet no problems with Walker, and I genuinely think the MCU fandom would air out a little bit more toxicity if people would be willing to do so.

But what do I know?

“Just fishin’ in the dark, son.”

Kyoko

ConTinual Comics Lair Presents Captain America: The Shield of Sam Wilson anthology panel

It is Sam Wilson’s year in 2025 and I couldn’t be happier for him. I’m overjoyed at the success of Captain America: Brave New World, and just as excited to say that we have hosted a free virtual panel through ConTinual featuring several of the authors of the Captain America: The Shield of Sam Wilson anthology. Each author talks about their unique short story with yours truly hosting, so if you’d like to learn more about our anthology, click the link below and enjoy!

ConTinual Comics Lair Presents Captain America: Brave New World

Loved Sam Wilson’s latest journey? Me too!

At the end of Avengers: Endgame, Steve Rogers passed his shield and his mantle to Sam Wilson. In The Falcon and the Winter Soldier, Sam made his peace with that and accepted his legacy. Now, in Captain America Brave New World, Sam has his first full-fledged outing as Cap.

Join guest moderator Kyoko M, guests Louise Herring-Jones, Andrea Maldonado, Marx Pyle, and Wayland Smith, and me in the Comics Lair as we discuss this movie.

https://www.facebook.com/nancy.northcott.1/videos/1115884383627158

Enjoy!

Captain America: The Shield of Sam Wilson anthology excerpt

Face front, True Believers! Can you believe that we are only two weeks away from the Captain America: The Shield of Sam Wilson short story anthology?! What a rush! Wanna know what’s even more of a rush?

WHEN MARVEL COMICS USES YOUR EXCERPT AS THE ONE FOR THE OFFICIAL ANNOUNCEMENT.

No, really.

They picked me.

._.

Eep.

I’m honored, humbled, and shocked to share this official Marvel/Titan Books excerpt with you for my story, “Lost Cause.” It’s about Sam and SHIELD receiving word that someone plans to break Brock “Crossbones” Rumlow out of the prison transport bus as they take him from the prison The R.A.F.T to ADX Colorado supermax prison, a prison from which no one has ever escaped. Sam is joined by Redwing, his faithful falcon, Nick Fury, and the prison guards aboard keeping Crossbones in line.

I can’t wait for you all to read our incredible stories! You can pre-order now in Kindle/Nook, hardcover, or audiobook. It’s very likely they will release it in paperback within a year, so be on the lookout!

As a Black man in America, Sam Wilson knows he has to be twice as good to get half as much credit. He must be a paragon of virtue for a nation that has mixed feelings towards him. In these thirteen brand-new stories, the all-new Captain America must thwart an insurrectionist plot, travel back in time, foil a racist conspiracy, and save the world over and over again.

As the Falcon, Sam Wilson was the first African American super hero in mainstream comic books. Sam’s trials and tribulations reflect the struggles many Black Americans go through today, as Sam balances fighting supervillains and saving the world with the difficulties of being the first Black Captain America. This action-packed anthology inspired by the Marvel comic book universe, will see Sam team up with familiar friends like Steve RogersRedwing and Nomad, while fighting HYDRASabretoothKingpin, and other infamous villains.

These are stories of death-defying courage, Black love and self-discovery. These are the stories of a super hero learning what it means to be a symbol. These are the stories of Sam Wilson.

Captain America: The Shield of Sam Wilson anthology by Marvel Comics and Titan Books

The time has come for me to make the biggest announcement of 2023: I have a short story in the upcoming anthology, Captain America: The Shield of Sam Wilson! Take a look at that cover and tell me if you see anyone familiar…

This wonderful anthology will be hitting bookshelves January 14th, 2025. Description and pre-order link below.

As a Black man in America, Sam Wilson knows he has to be twice as good to get half as much credit. He must be a paragon of virtue for a nation that has mixed feelings towards him. In these thirteen brand-new stories, the all-new Captain America must thwart an insurrectionist plot, travel back in time, foil a racist conspiracy, and save the world over and over again.

As the Falcon, Sam Wilson was the first African American super hero in mainstream comic books. Sam’s trials and tribulations reflect the struggles many Black Americans go through today, as Sam balances fighting supervillains and saving the world with the difficulties of being the first Black Captain America. This action-packed anthology inspired by the Marvel comic book universe, will see Sam team up with familiar friends like Steve RogersRedwing and Nomad, while fighting HYDRASabretoothKingpin, and other infamous villains.

These are stories of death-defying courage, Black love and self-discovery. These are the stories of a super hero learning what it means to be a symbol. These are the stories of Sam Wilson.

Pre-order it on your Kindle or in hardcover!

Kyoko’s Favorite Movies of 2016

So. This year has been an enormous, raging, uncontrollable garbage fire, but at least it gave us some good movies. Here’s my shortlist of the best movies for 2016 that have been released.

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Captain America: Civil War: I don’t think anyone’s shocked at this being one of my first picks for the best of 2016. Like the Avengers, this movie gives me a massive rush of fangasm to see so many of our Marvel heroes in one story, and it’s great because not only do we know the core team, but we also get introduced to some new faces. Everyone went into this movie expecting to love the fight scenes—which were incredible—and yet we all came out with the same consensus: bump the main team, we need 1000000% more Black Panther and Spider-Man. I am truly blown away how much I liked those two. They were by far the biggest standout characters introduced into the MCU and I cannot wait for both of their solo films, because they have proven to be incredibly interesting. Still, I of course give the movie credit for being the most heart-wrenching film in the MCU canon. We were hit hard and often in the feels, from losing Peggy Carter to seeing Tony and Steve’s friendship fall apart to seeing poor Bucky being used against his will to murder the innocent. It’s a phenomenal film with all the right elements and it has a massive rewatch quality for that same reason.

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Moana: Again, this is no surprise. I am a huge Disney fan, and I am especially a fan of Disney princess films and how they have evolved over the decades. Moana is exactly that: the natural progression of a Disney princess with modern day writing. Honestly, it’s like the movie had a checklist of “impossibly awesome things” and it just checked them off one by one. Likable, realistic protagonist? Check. Creative, visually-stunning environment? Check. Bechdel Test pass? Check. Hilarious lines? Check. Catchy-as-hell musical numbers? Check. Gripping story with plenty of action and adventure? Check. Open exploration of people of color, also portrayed by people of color? Check, check, check. This film is a dream. It’s just so exciting and wonderful and powerful that I’ve already seen it twice and I’m trying my hardest not to see it a third time before it leaves theaters. So few films understand that there is a difference between seeing a movie and experiencing a movie. Moana is an experience. I found myself tearing up at the oddest moments, at moments that weren’t even sad, because I was just so wrapped up in the adventure and how it made me feel like anything was possible and that I got to be on this journey with these wonderful characters. Call me petty, but I am so damned glad that Moana was the one to take the crown away from Frozen in terms of opening weekend. Every bit of praise this film has gotten is more than well-earned. It’s practically demanded.

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Storks: This one sort of slipped by a lot of people due to when it was released, but Storks was just the quirky kids’ film that I was looking for and I really enjoyed it. Even though I want to say they marketed it as the makers of the Lego Movie, this film smacks a lot of Cloudy with a Chance of Meatballs, in terms of 70% of the jokes being Lampshade Hanging. It could really be argued that it’s more for teens and adults than it is for kids’, and I think the box office and its critical reception reflect that. It’s certainly not a bad thing, either. I was howling. It’s extremely creative, the performances are hilarious, and the humor is spot on. I told my parents to rent it one day so they can crack up at all the great parenting jokes. I consider it a hidden gem among the 2016 films and it’s worth a watch if you haven’t seen it.

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Zootopia: Before Moana blew my mind, Zootopia was the other Disney film that completely made me fall head-over-heels in love with it, and I still am to this day. The last time I’ve watched a Disney film this many times, it was Tangled all the way back in 2010. I love Zootopia so much that I own two versions of it: the DVD and the Amazon streaming digital video, though to be fair, I didn’t know Netflix would add it to their library this fall. Zootopia is life. It’s such a well told story with an amazing examination of all kinds of prejudice, from basic sexism to complicated accidental reinforced stereotypes to obvious bigotry. I haven’t seen an animated film handle these concepts this well since Cats Don’t Dance. It’s so relevant now considering what’s been going on the past several years and yet even without the strongly worded, mature message, it’s just an enjoyable film with delightful characters.

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The Legend of Tarzan: Oh, quit gaping at me. This movie was also pretty much panned by most people, but no one really disliked it moreso than they were just indifferent to it. Of the movies on my list, this is definitely at the bottom, but regardless, I actually really enjoyed this movie. To be clear, I didn’t expect to. The trailers were pretty generic and I really adore Disney’s take on Tarzan, so I wasn’t really in the market for a new interpretation, but once I saw that it wasn’t Disney remaking itself like it’s been doing in recent years, I decided to give it a try. (And half naked Alexander Skarsgaard is hard to say no to.) I discovered a surprisingly thoughtful film that paid respect to both sides of the fence in terms of nature and man. It doesn’t browbeat and it doesn’t have the same white savior problem that a lot of films similar to it tend to have. I really loved the flashback scenes of Tarzan’s early life. They were gripping and deeply emotional, and the performances were excellent, as was the cinematography and the soundtrack. I would argue it’s worth a watch or a rental for that same reason. I do admit that Margot Robbie is extremely damsel-y and useless, and Christoph Waltz is completely wasted on this script, but everything else about the film was good.

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Deadpool: This needs no explanation. It was perfection. You know and I know it. Boom.

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Kubo and the Two Strings: Like Storks, Kubo was sort of a niche marketed film, really only made for those who are really passionate about animated fairytales. Well, I am one of those people. I adore Laika productions, and Kubo is no exception. It’s a masterfully told, utterly moving, impressively beautiful film. It’s mature, but it still is palatable for children and young adults. If nothing else, Kubo needs to be seen for how rich and vibrant and detailed its cinematography is, and considering everything is stop-motion, it demands to be appreciated. The only downside is that unfortunately, the cast is not as diverse as it should have been. Don’t get me wrong: the voices chosen totally fit the characters and each actor did one hell of a job, but I still find myself disappointed that a movie set in feudal Japan has so few Japanese actors in it. The biggest casualty is George Takei, who had about three lines as a minor character. What the hell, Hollywood. It’s friggin’ George Takei and you didn’t give him a main role? Shame on you! Despite that shortcoming, Kubo is phenomenal and should not be missed.

I’ve got two more films on the docket for 2016: Rogue One and Passengers, so stay tuned for a possible update to this list in a couple of weeks. Have a happy!

New Orleans Comic Con 2016

 

Me and Chris Evans aka Captain America

Your friendly neighborhood fantasy author just had an excursion to the land of awesome jazz, rich heritage, and the best damn Southern cuisine imaginable. It was basically Treat Yourself 2016 for me, and when I treat myself, I treat myself. Hence, Captain America snuggling and languishing in my arms.

New Orleans Comic Con is a younger con, but they apparently worked out something pretty incredible to snag not only Captain America himself, Chris Evans, but half of the cast of Civil War, including Frank Grillo (Rumlo aka Crossbones), Anthony Mackie (Sam Wilson/Falcon), Hayley Atwell (Peggy Carter), Jeremy Renner (aka Clint Barton/Hawkeye) and the Russo brothers who are directing the film. I had been on Wizard World’s mailing list for some reason and as soon as they sent word that Chris Evans would be in the South (seriously, look it up, A list celebrities avoid the South like the freaking plague, man, and I’d know) I scrambled for a ticket and a photo op. It was the opportunity of a life time to meet an actual superhero (my second one, actually, as I met Kevin Conroy, the voice of Batman, in 2013) in the flesh. Plus, I’d never been to New Orleans and I was dying to get a chance to soak in some of the great things I’ve heard about Crescent City.

I flew down Thursday afternoon and stayed with a friend of mine. On Friday, we got up and had breakfast here, at The Ruby Slipper.

I had cheesecake-stuffed French toast with fresh blueberry compote and it was so delicious I’m drooling as I think about it all over again. Heavenly stuff, man.

And here’s my first street car ride!

We headed to the con to grab our badges and check out the dealer’s room, which was huge and awesome. Here are the goodies I managed to swipe for myself:

This fancy lithograph came with the hilariously expensive Chris Evans silver VIP pass. It’s basically just a glossy 11×17 photo of Captain Hotness, but hey, why not? Who doesn’t love a little smolder?

This awesomeness is a fake movie poster made by one of the artists in the dealer’s room. His concept was taking nerd culture things and turning them into the 1940’s, 50’s, and 60’s style movie posters, and this one is so gorgeous that I had to snag it to decorate my room. It’s just plain lovely.

Below is another one by the same artist, except it’s from Fallout 3 & 4.

Saturday morning at 10am, I attended the Civil War panel, which includes all the guests I mentioned above. Because I’m a huge nerd and this was a lifetime opportunity, I sat by one of the mics and was lucky enough to ask a question. Yes. I spoke to half the cast of Captain America: Civil War. That high-pitched sound you’re hearing is me screaming internally for hours.

https://youtu.be/hDngKCGvOzQ

Unfortunately, the audio is a bit janky, but here’s the whole panel. I got to ask a question at around the 26 minute mark, and their answers were priceless. I really encourage you to watch the entire video, and if one with better quality pops up, I’ll add it. It was a phenomenal panel, even with some fans asking weird questions, and the cast was beyond entertaining to experience live.

After the panel, I had the two most awesome experiences as a fangirl ever. First, was meeting Hayley Atwell, Agent Carter herself, for an autograph. I managed to hold it together and I told her that I was so grateful for her portrayal of Peggy as this powerful, amazing three dimensional female character and how it’s so important to have this awesome woman on a major network television show. I also told her that I truly hope she enjoys all the wonderful things that have happened and will happen for her as a result of portraying this character, and Ms. Atwell told me she was so humbled by my words. We shook hands and I was able to take this precious piece of personal history home with me to be framed on my wall.

After that, the main event happened. I waited in line in a freezing cold auditorium for around an hour, dressed to the nines and in full makeup, and then it happened. I walked up to Captain America, Chris Evans, for a photograph.

Now, the funny thing is…I’ve met celebrities before. Not any A-list celebrities, mind you, but celebrities like Maggie Q, Shane West, Bill Corbett, James Urbaniak, who are mostly nerd icons. Each time, I’ve managed to hold in the fangirl squeeing and ask them questions, even hold entire conversations.

But not with Chris Evans.

He was the first celebrity to ever make me 100% starstruck and tongue-tied.

Before the hug, I walked over and said hi and asked him if it would be alright for me to give him a hug for the photo. Mr. Evans smiled and said it wasn’t a problem at all, and then he wrapped his arms around me and I basically lost all mental faculties. I actually had a comment prepared–something about how proud I was of what he’s done with the character of Steve Rogers–but after that hug…yep, I was mush. I just mumbled thank you and tottered away on my heels, blinded by how utterly handsome he was. The hug was that good, but then there’s also the fact that before he let me go, he rubbed the small of my back and that’s what precipitated me turning into a pile of goo. My God. What a man, what a man, what a mighty good man.

Oh, and here’s his autograph as well (sadly not personalized, because you had to pay an extra $200 for that and as much as I ADORE Chris Evans, paying over $600 for a photo op and personalized autograph was outside of my comfort zone.)

The rest of the trip wound down after I met Cap. I swung past the famous Cafe Du Monde for beignets and coffee, which were yummy. We had dinner at this cool seafood place called Mr. Ed’s Seafood Bar and then on Sunday we just walked around town to sight-see and eat at Deannie’s before I headed home. Honestly, the city was beautiful and stuffed with all kinds of feasts for the eyes (and stomach). I’m so happy that Treat Yo-self 2016 went as smoothly as it did, and I will never forget meeting my favorite Avenger in the flesh. It was Item Number Four on my Bucket List, and I’m so giddy I managed it before I turned 30. It was unforgettable.

And for your viewing pleasure, here’s my informal account of meeting Chris Evans, for poops and giggles.

On Altruism

captain_america_2

Altruism: (noun) the belief in or practice of disinterested and selfless concern for the well-being of others.

So Captain America: The Winter Soldier was frickin’ awesome.

I’ve already seen it twice and I plan to see it plenty more times. I’m so endlessly pleased with everything from the cinematography, to the fight choreography, to the chemistry between Steve and pretty much every single person in his life, and everything in between. I just adored it from start to finish.

However, sometime this week, my part-time mentor had a heated conversation on Facebook about why The Winter Soldier succeeded where Man of Steel (2013) failed. I didn’t participate and only saw it in passing, but it definitely got me thinking in terms of the writing.

First off, a disclaimer: I am one of the few people on the planet who doesn’t hate Man of Steel. That being said, I am also not quite a fan. I straddle the fence. Gun to my head, I’d give the movie 3 out of 5 stars—passable, mediocre, decent. The reason why is that Man of Steel did something that the other Superman films had not done yet: it took risks. Now, did those risks pay off? Ehhhhhh, kind of? In certain respects, the risks Man of Steel took paid off, like deciding to have Lois know Clark’s identity or showing Clark’s alienation and struggle to use his powers in non-selfish ways. The other risks, like Papa Kent being a selfish douche and dying for absolutely no reason or making Superman kill his first villain, no, I don’t think it pulled those dramatic changes off properly.

That’s what I want to chat about today: the differences between the attempted altruism in Man of Steel and the altruism that actually carried through in The Winter Soldier.

Mind you, it’s not my intent to compare the movies as a whole because they are two different entities—a reboot and a sequel with vastly different tones. Instead, let’s just focus on the super fellas themselves.

So in The Winter Soldier, Steve has begun to adjust to his surroundings. He is a great deal more cheerful than we saw him in the Avengers, where he was still in a bit of mourning for what he lost during his frozen slumber. He immediately bonds with Sam Wilson (Anthony Mackie for President! Whoo hoo!) and has oodles of chemistry—both friendly and sexual, you ask me—with Natasha, all the while still having major issues with SHIELD. It’s for good reason, too, since the Battle of New York caused infinite amounts of fear and paranoia with the world powers.

What I think TWS did correctly was the internal struggle of Steve’s orders versus Steve’s gut feeling. Especially with the opening sequence where they told him to save the hostages, and it turns out it was Nick Fury manipulating him. Steve’s anger was completely justified. Nick Fury tends to be the ultimate “big picture” kind of leader, so he could sacrifice a few lives if it saved billions, but that’s the problem. Alexander Pierce had the same idea, but in horrendously huger numbers. Steve had a choice to make, and it was by far one of the most important of his life. What’s more is that this idea carried through with Bucky as well. Once he learned the Winter Soldier’s true identity, Cap had to make a choice. He could have believed what Sam said, that the Winter Soldier was beyond saving, but he didn’t. He chose to have faith in his past friendship, a decision that could have cost him his life, but he still did it. I think that is definitely “the belief or practice of disinterested and selfless concern for the well-being of others.”

Now let’s take a look at the Man of Steel. Clark grew up confused and angry after learning that he had powers beyond anyone’s imagination to comprehend. He was bullied, and wanted badly, like any normal kid, to get some payback, but he restrained himself. He also ran into cosmic a-holes as an adult—seriously, Clark is an angel for not killing that guy in the bar, I’d have shoved that mug of beer right up his ass Hancock-style—and managed not to act on his anger there either. However, one of my many issues with this version of Clark is that they never directly address what the comic books bring up: the idea that Clark is against capital punishment. I might have cited it before, but the story “What’s So Funny About Truth, Justice, and the American Way?” by Joe Kelly, and later adapted into an awesome DC animated original film “Superman vs. the Elite” deals with the idea that Clark has the ability to stop a threat permanently, but chooses not to, and there are dire consequences for that decision.

If the film had perhaps started with Clark stopping small crimes here and there and resisting the urge to kill, then maybe Zod’s fate would have been easier to swallow, or perhaps more meaningful to the narrative. The film tried to give us an altruistic Superman, but because of Pa Kent’s negative behavior, the way he died, the way Clark constantly brooded over whether to trust the human race or not, it ended up shriveling up instead of flourishing. I could see the seeds trying to grow, but the joyless tone that Zack Snyder and David Goyer enforced on the movie prevented our Boy in Blue from his true Boy Scout nature.

I think Marvel has a better understanding of what makes our heroes the kind of people everyone can root for. They have darkness in their lives, and secrets, and flaws, but Marvel doesn’t let it swallow up their characters. There were plenty of hilarious lines (especially Nat and Steve and Steve and Sam) and heartwrenching dramatic scenes (I’m still crying about Steve and Peggy, hand me a tissue), but the overall effect is surprisingly hopeful. Even with SHIELD branded as terrorists and the world on the hunt for Nick Fury, the fact that Cap did the right thing in the end—choosing to try to save Bucky and trying to root out the Hydra from the good guys at the SHIELD HQ—is what made him an altruistic hero. We never really got that moment in the Man of Steel where Clark chose to believe in humanity. Sure, he protected it, but I didn’t feel his love and sacrifice for the people living alongside him. The only person he truly bonded with was Lois and you certainly felt his devotion to her, but not the human race.

Writing makes the difference between these two men, these two heroes. It’s perfectly possible to make a hero who has darkness in his life, but doesn’t let it define him. DC seems to not understand why The Dark Knight saga was successful and why Man of Steel couldn’t follow in its footsteps. Clark Kent and Bruce Wayne are opposites in every way: one from humble beginnings, one from privilege; one with an optimistic view, one with a pessimistic view; one who operates using the fantastic, one who operates using the practical. The Dark Knight seemed like it had a dark view of the world, and it did, but oddly enough, Bruce had a better grasp of altruism than Clark did, and that is why the Man of Steel couldn’t reach its potential. Bruce believed in his city without flinching. He believed that the people in Gotham were not beyond saving and that if he gave them an ideal and a symbol to believe in, they could get better and rise to the occasion. Captain America did that too. But Clark never did that.

In the end, I think the positive reactions to Captain America: The Winter Soldier are directly a result of Marvel and the movie writers understanding of what makes our heroes true heroes. It’s not that they are perfect and powerful, it’s that they are just as screwed up as we are, but they put their own needs aside to help us. They fight for our freedom and they make it personal. Cap didn’t have to give that speech asking the members of SHIELD to disobey direct orders. He could have been cynical and just tried to stop everything on his own, but he didn’t. He trusted us. And that’s why we love him.

*salutes* Here’s to you, Cap’n. Now get in my bed.

Things The Marvel Universe Taught Me About Writing

Face front, True Believers! Thor: The Dark World is premiering early in my current town of residence tonight and I could not be more excited. I know some people are a bit lukewarm about the God of Thunder, but I am just not one of them. Still, Thor is just one of Marvel’s greater successes, at least in my humble opinion. In honor of our big blond teddy bear god hitting the silver screen tonight, I’d like to take a quick look at some of the things that the Marvel Movie Universe has taught me over the years. I’m also taking a bit of freedom here with the term ‘Marvel Universe.’ I’m not simply talking about the continuity they created starting with Iron Man. I’d also like to take a look at their previous franchises like Spider-Man and X-Men because they are huge parts of my childhood as well as great teaching tools.

Know thy fanbase. This is one thing that Marvel has nailed repeatedly in recent years. They have an unparalleled ability to listen to their fans and figure out where to go from there. They didn’t always have this talent, mind you. A perfect example would be the horrific abomination that is Spider-Man 3. It’s common knowledge that one of the movie’s biggest reasons for sucking was due to executive meddling, where the studio poked their big nose into Sam Raimi’s script and told him to do stuff. It resulted in an overstuffed, over-the-top farce of a film that laid waste to the film’s previously excellent reputation. Here’s where knowing the fanbase kicked in.

Disclaimer: I didn’t like the Amazing Spider-Man. I’m sorry. Hate me if you wish. I just couldn’t help myself because Spider-Man and Spider-Man 2 are without a doubt two of my all-time favorite superhero/comic book movies. I grew up on them. I watched them hundreds of times, and I still have to stop every time one of them comes on. They have so much heart and depth and wonder to them. However, it turns out that while those two films broke box office records and definitively proved that superheroes are worth the general movie audience’s time, a lot of fanboys and girls were unhappy with certain aspects of them. The most vocal complaint was Kirsten Dunst as Mary Jane Watson, which I understand completely. I liked Mary Jane well enough in the first film, but by the second and third films, I kind of wanted her to get the Gwen Stacy treatment. She was weak and nagging and got stuck firmly in the “damsel in distress” role whereas in the comic books, she often kicked ass and sassed people like no one’s business.

Marvel gathered up these comments and then made the brilliant move of picking everyone’s favorite redhead (ironically to play a blonde; double ironically because she’s a natural blonde) Emma Stone to be Gwen Stacy. My dislike of Amazing Spider-Man notwithstanding, I fully admit this decision was a God-send. Emma Stone is funny, sexy, snarky, and an absolute joy to watch. While I still would have liked her as the new MJ, she did everything that I hoped she would do. Marvel understood that the best way to win over their fans was to listen to them and learn from their past mistakes.

In terms of writing, Marvel’s method is something I think all writers should enforce. I would never try to pander to my fanbase (if I had one), but I would take a serious look at the criticisms that arise for my work. Writing is subjective. So is the act of reading. No one reads a book the same way, and fans will inevitably find something in my writing that I didn’t know was there, or that I never considered could come across. If it’s a universal problem, it would be wise to address it either in a blog post, or more likely, subsequent works of mine. There are very few drawbacks to accepting detailed, intelligent arguments against your own work. Even if it pisses you off to your very core, you can only go up from there.

Give a damn about your own work. Strap in, folks. Mama’s about to lay the smackdown on some things here. To me, it is always easy to tell when Marvel gives a shit about their work. The quality of the filmmaking is the most telling of all. Stuff like Daredevil (bite me, nerds, it’s a shit film and you know it), Elektra, The Punisher (which I admit still has a corny charm to it), X-Men: The Last Stand (and that’s coming from someone who kinda likes it), Ghost Rider, and Fantastic Four have clear evidence that they weren’t invested in their products. I argue that each of the listed films lack charisma, effort, and heart, and was pushed out more to make a profit than to actually be considered worthy of the Marvel name.

On the flipside, films like The Avengers, X-Men and X-2, Spider-Man and Spider-Man 2, Iron Man, Captain America, The Incredible Hulk, and Thor have evidence that Marvel gave a crap and wanted to make great movies for its audience. They chose great directors, writers, and actors—people we love and trust to bring our favorite comic characters to life. Do you remember the day they announced Robert Downey Jr. to play Tony Stark? We all flipped our shit in celebration of such perfect casting. Same with Joss Whedon getting to direct The Avengers, which is arguably the best Marvel film to date, or Edward Norton getting to play Bruce Banner. These movies all went on to do incredibly well at the box office because Marvel put their foot down and opted for quality over profit. They knew that profit is a result of quality. They recognized that if they took their time to make a fantastic film franchise, they’ll make bucketloads of cash and keep us happy for decades to come.

It seems like common sense to give a crap about your own writing, but sadly, these days it is not. Anyone can be a writer. We live in a world where a faux masochistic relationship that was ripped off from a creepy codependent relationship between an emo teenage girl and a vampire both out-grossed the intricate, beautifully written world about a boy wizard. We live in a world where the crappiest of films can get sequels. We live in a world where actual effort is an afterthought. The easiest thing in the world is to not try.

Don’t be that writer. Sure, E.L. James and Stephanie Meyer are literally swimming in cash, but that doesn’t have to be you. The happiest authors in the world are the ones who stay true to themselves and write honestly. They write from within. They strive to make the best for us readers because they care and they want to create a wondrous world for us to dive into. They want to leave behind a legacy they can be proud of. Authors like Neil Gaiman, J.K. Rowling, and John Green are all down-to-earth, humble, and full of life because they give a shit about what they put out there.

It’s unwise to compare oneself to bestselling authors, but they can also simply be a north star for young authors. Yes, it’s daunting that crappy novels make money, and crappy movies make even more money, but for every turd there’s a gem. Shoot for that instead.

Have faith in your own product. There’s a line from the movie Hitch that I always think about when it comes to certain aspects of writing.

Albert: You’re selling the stuff, but you don’t believe in your own product.

Hitch: Love is my life.

Albert: No! Love is your job.

Marvel is by no means perfect. I’ve already listed the films I consider to be travesties. But that’s also something I think they have learned well in the past decade. One of the main reasons why I favor Marvel over DC in the film department is the overwhelming amount of faith that they appear to have in the characters as well as their audience. They seem to recognize that there is a reason these films do so well. These characters and stories helped many of us grow up. We read them dozens of times as kids and we still follow them as adults because heroes inspire us. Heroes make us believe in the impossible. They make us want to be better than who we are. The Marvel films that tend to be better in quality are those where you can tell that the writers, directors, and actors actually care about the subject matter and want to do it justice. Tony Stark is by far the most popular of the Marvel universe, and guess what? He’s an asshole with a drinking problem. We can totally relate to that. Sure, he’s a billionaire, but most of us know someone like that—an insanely talented friend who has a good heart, but lacks focus and belief.

Marvel is out there kicking the box office’s ass every year because they believe in our heroes. They don’t always get it right (I’m still angry about Barakapool from X-Men Origins and whatever the hell they did to Beast in X-Men: First Class) but it is clear that they realize if they make a good film, we’ll watch it. We’ll stand outside in a line to San Diego Comic Con for hours just to catch a glimpse of the next one. We’ll waste hours online crying over Tom Hiddleston’s perfection. We’ll buy tickets early and dress up in costumes even when it’s nowhere near Halloween. It’s love, plain and simple.

Maybe you’re not Jim Butcher or Stephen King. So what? Do you have something to say in your writing? Do you want it go be good? Bam. There you go. That’s it. That’s your secret. No one said you had to be Shakespeare. The best way to become a great writer is to invest in your product the same way you invest in the TV shows and books and movies and video games you love. Pour your soul into your writing, even if your soul is twisted and scary and broken. Authenticity is key. No one will believe in your work if you don’t believe in it.

With that in mind, I hope that Thor: The Dark World uses the positive examples I discussed above. We have a lot of exciting films coming our way in the not-too-distant future and I can’t wait to see more as long as they adhere to their better works. Here’s to you, Marvel. Excelsior!

-Kyoko

P.S. While I’ve got you here, did you know that the giveaway for a free copy of my novel, The Black Parade, is still going on? Why not pop by and enter to win? It only takes a second. It ends Monday, November 11, 2013. Don’t miss out!