Rss

Archives for : blog post

Cautionary Tale: Red One

There are times that I find myself confused as an elder god millennial, and guys, I have to admit that I am highly confused by the bizarre film that I saw a couple of weekends ago in theaters.

By now, Red One has a reputation, and it should. It is one of the most baffling misfires that I’ve seen personally in a long time, and frankly, we haven’t seen a misfire on this scale since about Madame Web. Now, granted, we have still had some movies fail that didn’t expect to fail after the actors/writers strike of last year, but Red One is a slam dunk that somehow was the most pathetically lazy showing of The Rock’s career, which is saying something considering– *points to his last at least 7 films* So I decided this movie would be a great subject for a highly confused Cautionary Tale segment. I mean, at least this time I’m not angry? Yay?

Just in case you haven’t heard, Red One is a Christmas action-adventure film (or it’s supposed to be one) that stars The Rock (and no, I will NEVER call him Dwayne Johnson even though I know this man wants me to call him Dwayne Johnson; I’m a millennial and we hate change, so I’m gonna call him The Rock until I die.), Chris Evans, Lucy Liu, and JK Simmons along with a couple familiar faces like Nick Kroll and that big-headed girl from the Sabrina Netflix remake (whom I personally know as the snotty little BD Merrill from Feud: Bette and Joan, amusingly enough.) It originally was gonna be a Netflix movie, but for reasons I have yet to fathom, they released it in theaters (though most likely, the bloated budget made them have to try for theater money despite this movie being so low effort it could only have been made by Netflix). And by the way, that is a longer conversation America desperately needs to have with every single studio and streaming channel. We need to talk about the fact that we’ve had several films in the last few years that should’ve been streaming (Abigail, 65, Cocaine Bear) instead of released in theaters in order to be moderately successful, and then we’ve had some movies that SHOULD have been released in theaters but weren’t (both Extraction films as well as Prey aka that Predator movie with the Comanche warriors). I think Red One is just an entry in a long list of streaming and theater films in which nobody at all understood the assignment. Somehow.

I say somehow because seriously, who messes up “The Rock and Chris Evans save Christmas”?

Well, sadly, Red One figured out how.

Before I dive into the mess, I’ll give you a short version of the story itself. Odds are you skipped this movie and for good reason, but let me make the following disclaimer: I in no way hate this film nor do I think it’s a bad film. It’s just aggressively fucking lazy. And I’ll be honest—I have no proof but I also think this was an AI-generated script. I’ll explain below, but for now, spoilers for the events of Red One.

In Red One, Santa Claus (JK Simmons) and pretty much most mythological creatures are real, but they naturally just hide from the modern world at large under the umbrella of a global off the books type of outfit that maintains public safety and maintains these magical creatures. Santa Claus’ bodyguard, Cal Drift (The Rock), is handing in his resignation letter after 500 years of service. Why? Oh, he has good reason—everyone sucks now. Just so much. This is basically the only part of the movie they got right—Cal’s cynicism is ungodly accurate, and I say that as a former retail worker of almost 10 fucking years. I also say that as someone forced to delivery groceries for extra money. Everyone fucking sucks, and even though I know this movie was filmed between 2022 and 2023 and had no idea the results of the election, it’s also now painfully timely that Cal notes that every adult in the world is a sack of shit and he’s tired of providing for them knowing they all suck. Santa is saddened, but accepts his resignation, but quite literally ONE SCENE LATER, Santa is kidnapped. Cal and his people note that a suspicious activity clue links to a guy named Jack O’Malley (Chris Evans), who is allegedly the best tracker in the world. They interrogate him and find out all he did was locate Christmas Town, but he has no idea who hired him nor does he have any other clues, so they resolve to use him as a link to investigate and save Santa before he’s either killed or there is no Christmas that year for them.

Now, again, on paper, that sounds fine. Just a cut and dry buddy cop format—a stoic bodyguard forced to work with a cynical thief, gambler, and deadbeat dad, to save Christmas. Again, winning formula, and I have no complaints about the premise.

The problem is this movie absolutely bungles every single part of it.

And I mean…every. Single. Part. Of. It.

And frankly? I’m not sure why.

So what doesn’t work about it, you ask? Well, since I’ve had a few weeks to think it over, I’ve boiled it down to a few issues. I’m not aware if anyone involved in the film has explained anything about its production or its poor box office performance, so this is just my own musings, nothing backed up by an interview or a quote.

First off, it was a mistake to pick this role for Chris Evans. Not that Chris Evans couldn’t do it. Chris Evans has more than shown us he has incredible range as an actor, and I genuinely mean that. He has shown us he can do serious work, comedic work, action, romance, and every genre in between. He’s not let himself get pigeonholed like he did in the early 2000s where he was kinda just “that hot guy in mediocre movies” until he got his big break with Captain America and has been kicking ass on the silver screen ever since. And that’s part of my massive disappointment here. I love Chris Evans to death. The man gives great hugs and he’s uber talented. The problem is that Red One was probably made by the same fucking AI-generator as Red Notice, that utterly lame and forgettable big budget Netflix film with, who else: The Rock, Ryan Reynolds, and Gal Gadot. These movies are painfully similar in premise and execution, but the difference is that while Red Notice sucked ass, Ryan Reynolds was GENUINELY trying to be funny, and he was successful half of the time. Even though that movie sucks, Reynolds was able to claw his way out of that terrible script and found just a handful of funny moments to help us get through it.

And sadly, Chris Evans ain’t get that chance here. Boy, did he not.

Pretty much every single thing out of his mouth in this film is a cliché of some sort, whether it’s an old cliché or a new one. I cannot identify a single original thought anywhere in this film, and that’s insane considering Evans has wonderful comedic timing. I mean that—not just scripts. If you’re a fan, you know very well that Chris Evans is a big fat fucking goober in real life. He’s silly and insecure and sweet and just an all around fun person, so it makes no sense to me that Jack O’Malley is such a generic character that not even Evans’ natural fucking charm could make the character work. He has nothing to do. It’s just a miscasting of titanic proportions, not because he’s not right for a buddy cop movie with the Rock; it’s that they made this character so bland that even his performance couldn’t make it better. It’s a lot like how Disney totally misused him in Lightyear by making the “real” Buzz a dull, generic character. It’s just so generic he might as well be a talking bowl of oatmeal. There’s nothing for him to bite into at all, and that just makes me so sad because they had to have told him not to improv to make the movie funnier and they must have told The Rock the same thing.  And boy, was that a mistake.

Second off, it was a mistake to pick this performance for The Rock. Now, I’m not stupid. The Rock is not a good actor; the Rock is an entertaining actor. By about Jumanji II time, the Rock figured out his career. He knows that he can do exactly two things in every movie: be a stoic guy or be his actual personality, which is a funny, charming, witty guy with a big heart. And that’s literally okay. I can name several actors and actresses that play the same role 1000x because we like it and it’s fine. (Ex. Bruce Willis is the same dude in everything and none of us care ‘cause he’s FUCKIN’ COOL) But deciding to make Chris Evans the mouthy one and the Rock the Straight Man? MIIIIIIIIIIIIISTAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAKE! It was PAINFUL. Watching The Rock do his Straight Man bit after I’ve seen him do great comedic work like Be Cool (shut up, I love that movie, and it’s way better than Get Shorty COME AT ME SCRUBLORDS I AM RIPPED) or The Rundown made me sigh. Look, I get it. You can’t have two mouthy main leads or you end up with that horrible Predator sequel that had Key in it (I shit you not, the entire film was nothing but comedic sidekicks except they were all main leads; it is even worse than you think it is), but at the same time, this was NOT the time to make The Rock do his Straight Man routine. Cal is having a crisis of conscience; not his own, but that he thinks every adult is a POS and he doesn’t want to make them happy anymore. And I’m not saying we needed him to be quippy and sarcastic. He has no personality. He’s just Tough Guy ™. We learn NOTHING about him. We don’t know how he got the job, what kind of entity he is (we know he’s not human since he’s worked for Nick for 500 years and he’s also very fast and strong, does more than a human can do), how long he’ll live for, how long he’s already lived for, how he got to work for Santa, just NOTHING! A big bowl of nothing! And I think it’s because someone told the AI “do not have a single scene of exposition” and it listened. We needed to know more but because the film’s focus is on these over-done action sequences (that by the way, look fake as shit and they need to fire that SFX company), almost nothing about Cal’s arc feels satisfying by the end. It was the wrong call to ask him not to insert his natural charm into the movie, same as Evans’, and the film suffers massively for it.

Third of all…and I can’t believe I’m about to say this about a fucking Christmas movie…it’s too goddamn serious. I mean it. All of the advertising made this film look like a funny, tongue in cheek romp. Well, guess what? You get there, sit down, and the movie proceeds to take itself as seriously as Leon: The Professional for a whole sixty percent of the story. WHO ASKED FOR THAT?! Did the trailer’s editor just think he had to sell the movie to us this way or we wouldn’t go? It’s a complete 180 from what was advertised to us, so not only are you sitting through dry, cliché dialogue, the movie can’t even brighten up with a joke for more than half of its running time. It is a decision that still baffles me to this very day. I’m not saying every Christmas movie needs to be a comedy and not have serious moments. I’m just saying this shit was borderline false advertising. I kept throwing my hands up as I sat in the theater because every five minutes, the movie would act like it was a serious affair and I should care about these people even though it gave me no reason to care about them. The movie is so tone deaf and it has no idea what the mood is from scene to scene. It can’t focus worth a damn on its own message.

Fourth of all, the “no exposition” rule crippled the film. Not only do they not explain what the mythical entity agency is and does, they don’t explain fuckall about anything else in the movie. They must have been told no exposition because they don’t even do it in spots where we actually need it. Again, I get it. Nobody likes exposition dumps, and yes, you as a modern screenwriter should be finding clever ways to fill the audience in without dumping it, but not doing it at all is fucking dumb. Why? Because it means your audience has no idea what the stakes are and what can or cannot be done inside of your magic system. The reason you set up rules and limitations is so when we encounter a problem, we don’t immediately assume it can be resolved no problem with magic. Hell, it was one of the leading issues with the Harry Potter books—so many people pointed out plotholes that neither JK nor the story wanted to explain away with magic. Here, we don’t know what Cal can and cannot do or if he can even die or what his abilities are and the exposition would have made that clear. Same as how there is a huge plot hole in the third act where Jack and his son quite literally luck their way out of a problem. And the lack of exposition also made the villain’s defeat confusing as hell (i.e. If touching the globes made her go into one, did she never pick one up after they were made? Did it only work because she fell into hundreds of them? If she has one nice moment with another person, is it going to easily let her out? COME ON MOVIE ANSWER ME.) There are just too many scenes where I had a question that the movie should have already answered, but didn’t possibly due to some kind of anti-exposition edict.

Fifth of all, JK Simmons and Lucy Liu were completely underused, and they were part of why I even went to the film. JK Simmons has more than proven that like Chris Evans, he has a ton of range, so making him an AND credit sucked big time. Lucy Liu is barely given time too, only being their handler and getting one damn fight scene. Ugh. What a stupid decision. I’d much rather watch them than another CGI-soaked soundstage action scene.

Sixth and finally, the dialogue very much reads like (1) it was AI generated and (2) someone was gonna go back through the draft to punch up the jokes, but ran out of time and never did. I mean it. There are so many moments in the film where it looks like the script says “insert funny line here later” and it makes everything feel so stilted and unnatural as a result. The characters say things no one in their right mind would say; again, why I think it was written by AI. It’s just constant clichés said without a wink or a nod or anything at all. Even the “save Christmas” scene that is supposed to be funny is instead very, very awkward and unnatural. I laughed three times in a two hour movie, people. And the people around me weren’t really laughing much either. It’s just so lazy. It has nothing to say. The characters might as well be walking around jabbering like those Sims characters.

So what can we learn from Red One shitting the bed?

AI should not be writing your damn script. Yeah, I get it, it’s easy and it’s free, but screw you if you want to be a writer and you’re using AI to do the entire thing. It should be a jumping off point or a resource for ideas, not the apparatus with which you make art that you expect to be paid for. Do the damn work and stop relying on AI theft to put your screenplay together.

Know how to cast your movie accordingly. I really think The Rock and Chris Evans could have been so fun together had this not been a lazy, lifeless script too concerned with action and lack of exposition. They should have asked them both to improv here or there to get the dialogue more natural-sounding and to punch up the simple plot. I hope they someday decide to team up again in a much better film; the chemistry is there, but the film just didn’t use it. This script is so generic you could put anyone in those roles and it wouldn’t be any more appealing.

Pick a consistent tone between your film and the trailers. I’m still mad about how serious a movie about saving Christmas had to be. It’s just so needless. If this movie had been as campy as the trailer, we could’ve hit a homerun. Pretty much all the action and camp are in the trailer; the rest of the film is painfully serious, which makes no sense considering it’s also so generic and bland. To be fair, this problem is also not unique to Red One. Hollywood in general needs to stop editing trailers to be misleading and should be fined when they do it, if you ask me. If you made a serious movie, then make a serious trailer. If you made a silly movie, then make a silly trailer. It’s not hard, okay? Just get specific so you attract the right person to the right movie. If you don’t, the wrong person sees it and blasts you on social media and through Word of Mouth, which costs you money.

Don’t rely completely on your casting and make sure you’re still delivering a satisfying story. I can tell they thought this up before The Rock’s career started to decline, which it did around 2020 and around the time Black Adam bombed. By the time they were filming, he’d done a ton of damage to his career by picking shitty films and then getting a reputation for being egotistical and unprofessional. I’m personally hurt to hear that as I’d been rooting for him since after The Rundown, but unfortunately, he’s been spiraling and he took this movie down with him in some ways. The public has been disinterested in him since Black Adam and Chris Evans’ post Captain America career, while fine, hasn’t been headliner movies, so his popularity wasn’t enough to put butts in seats for $15 a person.

Know the difference between a streaming quality movie and a theater quality movie. Covid changed how we see movies. Some people learned patience and are fine with a movie coming to home release sooner since they no longer want to risk covid just for entertainment. These studios need to start paying better attention to their content. It should’ve stayed a streaming movie. I’m mad I spent the money on something so generic and I’m probably not the only one. The people are showing you what they consider worth a trip to the theater. For example, Moana 2 opened very well at the box office and that’s a smart move by Disney, especially since she was coming up on her 10 year anniversary in 2026. Red One should have stayed on Netflix given its lazy writing and lackluster effects, but it didn’t, so now it’s also a box office bomb and critically panned. If it had simply been streaming only, sure, we’d have pointed out all this same stuff, but we also would be less harsh because it meant we didn’t pay $15-30 to see it. Seeing a lousy movie for free or streaming price versus theater prices is now a thing. You better make a good movie or we will get on social media and blast your ass apart. They need to look at these reviews and pay attention to why it didn’t perform despite all the A list stars attached and the simple but likable premise.

If anything, I just hope they learn that there are only so many lazy films that will turn a profit. You have to stop being so lazy and bother to care about story and character, especially now that people have so many options for entertainment. Star power isn’t everything. It’s just a piece of the pie. So y’all better learn how to bake better or you’re gonna go out of business.

Cautionary Tale: Agatha All Along

Like most people, I don’t fucking appreciate it when someone wastes my time.

To preface this Cautionary Tale episode, I will say that I am among the minority in terms of how I feel about the Marvel Cinematic Universe. I disagree with people that claim everything went downhill after Avengers: Endgame. I in fact vehemently disagree. I think the company itself has had issues with quality control for certain– *stares motherfuckerly at Ant Man 2, Loki seasons 1 and 2, Thor 4, Doctor Strange 2, and Secret Invasion* –but I don’t think they’re hacks and I don’t think everything after Phase 3 was crap. I think they simply lost the thread and need to get back on track for consistently good material instead of this wild variation between good and crap.

Well, I can say with full confidence that if they ever make another show as bad as Agatha All Along, then the people who hate the MCU are going to have a lot of future material to complain about. And I might join them at that point.

For those who don’t know, I’ll do a brief recap of the premise of what led us up to the “story” in Agatha All Along. From this point forward, I will be spoiling the events of WandaVision and Agatha All Along as well as Doctor Strange in the Multiverse of Madness, so if you’re behind on those works, you may want to come back after you’ve seen them.

In WandaVision, Wanda basically snapped after finding out the government took Vision’s body after he was murdered in Infinity War and were essentially trying to reconstruct him. They were unsuccessful, to a point, so she now has confirmation the love of her life is gone forever. She was crushed to come back to life after Endgame and find him gone forever, and in her grief, she created a Hex that created an alternate reality that trapped a very small town of people inside her delusional fantasy in which Vision was alive and well and she had twin boys and a picturesque life that was modeled after her favorite sitcoms growing up. Over the course of the show, she eventually becomes cognizant of what she’s done and she finally resolves to undo it all. She destroys the Hex and returns all the citizens to their normal lives except for Agatha Harkness, who turned out to be an evil witch that got close to try and steal Wanda’s powers. They have a fight and Wanda curses Agatha to not remember who she is and instead lets her live a pretend life in Westview. The events of Doctor Strange in the Multiverse of Madness then occur and then this show picks up sometime after that has already gone down.

Agatha All Along picks up with Agatha still under Wanda’s spell, but a boy named Teen breaks her out of it and asks her to take him to The Witches’ Road. The Witches’ Road is a mythical alternate reality or dimension in which you are tested by several trials and if you get through them all alive, you will win the prize, which is anything that you desire, sort of like a wish at the pot of gold at the end of a rainbow. In the MCU, Agatha Harkness has been rumored to be the only witch that ever made it to the end of The Road, but she was bound by Wanda and can’t use her powers, so she agrees to take Teen on the road so she can get her powers back, but they have to gather a coven first to summon it. They recruit a few other witches and the summon the Road, but they also have the Salem 7, a coven of witches that hate Agatha, and Rio, a psychotic killer witch that also hates Agatha, on their heels. They have to pass every trial alive in order to get what each of them seeks at the end.

Now, that sounds fine, right? A little convoluted, but fine. So why is Agatha All Along the subject of yet another blog post of Cautionary Tales from me?

Because I fucking hate it when a work of fiction wastes my fucking time.

Prior to the final two episodes of Agatha All Along, I was actually enjoying myself. It was nothing groundbreaking, but it held my attention and had an interesting cast. In particular, I felt Ellie and Lily were by far the best acted and written characters in the small coven. They were competent and layered characters who directly contributed to passing some of the trials on The Road. Over the course of the trials, they both die trying to save someone: Ellie dies trying to save Agatha, who absorbs her power and kills her, and Lily dies killing the Salem 7 when they come after them. It was immensely sad to see them go, but they both were fantastic characters with meaty roles, so I accepted it.

And then the last two fucking episodes happened.

To spoil, Agatha, Rio, and Teen—who turns out to be the soul of Wanda’s son Billy inhabiting a new body after the person died right when the Hex closed—have a showdown and Agatha finally lets Rio, who it turns out is really Death, kill her at last, sparing Billy’s life since they made a deal that one of them had to die. Agatha comes back as a ghost and Billy then realizes The Road was not real. Instead, what Agatha did back when she was alive in the 1700s is make up the Road to lure unsuspecting witches and steal their power and murder them all so she can have all their powers. She killed thousands of witches for centuries with this stupid fucking con. When Billy came to her, his reality warping powers that Wanda had basically made The Road real without him knowing it.

Anyone with half a brain should now be able to tell why the hell I’m so fucking angry.

The entire show was POINTLESS.

Ellie and Lily died…for nothing.

Not only did they die for nothing…they died to advance the fucking story of a fucking white woman who is a fucking mass murderer.

And the show proceeds to reward Agatha for this by letting her come back as a ghost, meanwhile the two of them had to die and go to the afterlife.

Oh, and the only black witch? She got no backstory while everyone else there got a backstory.

Again, no one reading this should be surprised that the ending of this show ENRAGED me.

How. Dare. You.

How dare you make a twist that not only trivializes the deaths of two minorities over a white woman who is a mass murderer, but how dare you then do it JUST TO DO IT. The twist does not enhance anything. All it does is subvert your expectations in an incredibly negative way. Instead of tying together ANYTHING in the previous episodes, the final two episodes of Agatha All Along take an interesting story about power, death, and the ambiguous nature of seeking power and turns into a cheap, knockoff M. Night Shymalan production.

I fiercely argue this is not an opinion, too. This is bad writing.

Do you want proof?

Fine. Here are ALL the things that have NO fucking payoff from this series with the “twist” ending that the fucking Road was never real and only Billy made it real:

-Jen’s character arc is completely unfinished. Choosing not to show us her backstory, how she was bound, why she wants power, how she survived through the centuries without it, completely makes this an Aborted Arc. Jen living at the end of the show doesn’t mean shit. You don’t get to go “oh, well, maybe if this show does well, she’ll get a spinoff and we’ll finish her arc then.” NO. If you introduced her arc and you did not finish it in this work, you have FAILED as a writer. That is not how this works. I don’t care that this is an episodic thing. You introduce it, then you fucking tie it off.

-The Salem 7 were built up as sooooo scary and contributed NOTHING to the story. They never fight them, they never trap them, and no one ever explains who they are and why only NOW they somehow found Agatha again when she’s been around in the MCU for God knows how fucking long. They die in an anticlimax after a beautiful sacrifice by Lily. Why in God’s name did you bother to even put them in? They serve NO purpose! They never catch them or hurt them or do anything at all!

-Sharon Davis, the cutesy neighbor, again, died because Agatha dragged her along to avoid having to bring Rio with them. Why was she here? She dies just to die! Why was she included at all? She adds nothing to the story and there is no payoff and her death doesn’t even affect the coven. And Rio ended up on the fucking journey anyway, so it was a waste of time and a waste of that actress’ talent considering she shows up twice and dies and it has no effect on anything.

-Lily’s sacrifice meant nothing. She died saving a woman who killed thousands of witches for her own selfish gain and who was such a low down dirty sack of shit that she taught her own fucking son to help her murder people. Why would you take this interesting, layered character and sacrifice her for a mass murderer? What about that is satisfying? What about that is meaningful?

-Ellie’s sacrifice meant nothing. She died saving a woman who killed thousands of witches for her own selfish gain. Again, why? What does that say about this fucking story that she had to die so some evil piece of shit could keep fucking people over for her own gain?

-The story starts and ends at the exact…same…fucking…place. The ENTIRE ordeal that resulted in the deaths of two innocent fucking women did not affect anything. The only thing it changed is Billy can now access his powers and wants to find Tommy. Agatha is dead, but a ghost and still alive to fuck people over, so the entire motherfucking eight hours of my life have been wasted on a story in which only TWO things have changed since it happened.

-Billy gets mad at Agatha after discovering The Road was just a con and tries to banish her, but then inexplicably he’s fine with being a murderer ONE conversation after he just tried to banish her. WHAT CHANGED!? What changed about Agatha murdering thousands of witches and you just killed two people with your magic for no reason? Why would you EVER think you wanted Agatha around after watching her admit to being a mass murderer? Why would you EVER think she could help you? Nothing she’s done has indicated she will be of any use and chances are great all she’ll do is find a way to come back to life and steal your power. It makes no sense that Billy is fine with having killed Ellie and Lily and is now besties with Agatha again after she abandoned him and just happened to have second thoughts. It was the worst attempt at a redemption arc that I have ever seen in my life. It is a pathetic, nonsensical showing of bad writing and I will die mad because I know this entire fandom ate it right up.

Many people in my life have heard my rant about what I call White Heifer Syndrome, and Agatha All Along is no different from that argument. Once again, a major studio has written a story in which a white woman fucks over hundreds of people and does not suffer the direct consequences of what she’s done, and her actions fucked over people of color in particular and that is why I am this angry at this show. I am sick and tired of watching white women in fiction fuck over hundreds of people and be treated like they’re a girlboss. Agatha Harkness is a fucking monster and I was FINE WITH IT when the show was treating her like a monster. Then the show proceeds to ignore Jen and give us Agatha’s “boo fuckity hoo” backstory and act like this literal mass murderer should garner my sympathy. Because you know, having a tragic backstory makes it all okay. All those dead witches, don’t worry about it! Feel sorry for poor, poor Agatha and her dead kid! It’s just the most crushing thing ever, isn’t it?

So what can we learn from this unmitigated fucking disaster?

Fuck twist endings. Yeah, I said. Fuck ‘em. I have completely reached a point of not wanting any major studio to handle a twist ending ever again. Stop making a twist just to make a twist. Subverting expectations only works when it is service to the story and the characters. If you do it just to avoid us predicting the outcome, you’ve insulted everyone’s intelligence and wasted their time.

Stop glorifying mass murderers and then trying to justify their behavior with a tragic backstory. A dead kid is no fun for anyone, but I am not about to excuse this empty ass bitch for slaughtering thousands to get more power all because boo hoo, your son is dead. Go to therapy, you jackass. If you’re gonna be evil, then be evil and shut the hell up about your pain because nobody cares. Like Rocket Racoon once said, everybody’s got dead people. It doesn’t give you the right to get everyone around you killed and then walk away from it with a smile, acting like you deserve anything other than misery. Stop asking the audience to treat white mass murderers like pop stars. Just stop it.

Stop killing women of color to advance a white woman’s story and then glorifying said white woman as if she somehow deserves their sacrifices. Women of color are not your fucking stepping stone. We are not your tools. We are not your Magical Negroes who advance white stories and then promptly fucking die for our trouble. Make these white women earn their keep themselves and stop forcing women of color onto their knees so white women can stand on their backs and declare themselves girlbosses. Hold these awful characters accountable and let women of color have agency of their own.

If you introduce a concept or a character, then you need to tie that off by the end of the work or you need directly address how it’ll be resolved in a future work. I don’t give a damn that Jen lived through the ordeal and got her powers back and may appear in the future. There was NO reason to focus an entire episode on Agatha being a mass murderer and shoving Jen aside when the other characters all got to have their backstories explored. Don’t think I didn’t notice the only black character got shafted, and don’t think I didn’t notice she’s a brown-skinned black woman at that and was fucked over by this story. I am not going to keep showing up to any property that cannot treat women across the board the same in terms of importance. This show was an utter disservice to these actresses and just served to glorify a woman who in no way deserves anything but hatred.

Marvel Cinematic Universe, I want nothing more than to keep loving you as I have over the last twenty years, but if THIS is the best that you can do…

You might be the next Cautionary Tale.

Get it the fuck together, MCU.

Signed,

An Angry Fangirl Named Kyoko

Ghost Protocol: Dating in the New Millennium by C.R. Burnett Q & A

Everyone, I am pleased to announce that an upcoming romantic comedy and life experiences book will be hitting shelves soon from an associate of mine, C.R. Burnett! Read below for more details!

Ghost Protocol: Dating In The New Millennium delves deep into the realms of ghosting, online dating, and the ever-elusive search for true love. Ms. Burnett’s empathetic approach to the subject matter allows readers to relate to the struggles and triumphs of the characters, offering valuable insights and advice for navigating the turbulent waters of modern romance.

With her unparalleled ability to capture the essence of our time, C.R. Burnett emerges as a visionary voice within the realm of relationship literature. Her debut short story collection promises to be an indispensable guide for anyone traversing the dating landscape of the new millennium, providing both solace and inspiration in equal measure.

Release date: November 23rd, 2024

Book Trailer: https://youtu.be/hLEk_TieZZw

About the Author:

C.R. Burnett is an emerging author who has brought forth a captivating insight into the intricacies of modern-day dating with her inaugural book, Ghost Protocol: Dating In The New Millennium. With a unique perspective and a knack for understanding the complexities of human relationships, Ms. Burnett masterfully navigates the ever-evolving world of romance in this thought-provoking and engaging read.

As an author, Ms. Burnett’s writing style seamlessly blends humor, wit, and astute observations, creating a literary experience that leaves readers both entertained and enlightened. Through her compelling storytelling, she sheds light on the challenges faced by contemporary individuals seeking connection in an era marked by technological advancements and societal shifts.

I sat down with Ms. Burnett for an interview that I’d love to share with you!

When did you start to write and what drove you to write this book?

I began writing at a very young age—just three years old—when I first mimicked the words in the letters my father sent to my mother when he was in the Air Force and stationed abroad. This early exposure to the written word sparked a lifelong passion for writing. I was inspired to write Ghost Protocol: Dating in the New Millennium based on my own experiences and those of others as we navigated the complexities of attempting to form genuine relationships in a digital age. As online dating became the new norm, I witnessed firsthand the challenges and often awkward moments that come with trying to connect with others in this evolving landscape. This book aims to explore those experiences and offer insight into finding meaningful connections in a world increasingly defined by technology.

What can you tell us about the book?

Ghost Protocol: Dating in the New Millennium delves into the complexities of forming genuine relationships in an era where access to anyone, anywhere, paradoxically leads to greater disconnection. It explores various relationship types, including friendships, romantic connections, and family dynamics, highlighting the breakdown of communication in our interactions with each other. Drawing from both personal anecdotes and the experiences of others, it uncovers the challenges and awkward moments of navigating relationships in general while seeking to provide insights for fostering meaningful connections in real life in this increasingly digital world.

Tell us more about yourself. What’s your background?

Well, I was born on an Air Force Base in Kansas, lived in quite a few states due to my father’s enlistment, and once he completed his duty, we settled in Nashville, TN where I grew up and call home. I graduated from high school and college in Kansas, where my parents are both originally from. I’ve always had a passion for storytelling, which first emerged in grade school when I began writing short stories featuring my friends and me as heroines in supernatural adventures. This love for writing continued into junior high, where I served as an editor for the school newspaper, honing my skills in crafting engaging narratives. In high school, I turned to poetry as a way to process my experiences and emotions, and I contributed to a poetry review publication that deepened my appreciation for the art form.

I pursued a Bachelor of Arts in English Creative Writing at Kansas State University, followed by a Master’s in the same field from Southern New Hampshire University. It was during my graduate studies that I began working on my book as a capstone project, culminating in my graduation in 2017. Since then, I have also had the privilege of teaching English at the college level, where I share my love for literature and writing with my students.

What made you decide to write about the perils of modern dating?

You know, if I had a dollar for every crazy conversation screenshot that I’ve collected over the years, I could probably fund a small indie film about modern dating! I’m saving them for the revival of my Woke Girls Don’t Date podcast. Seriously, it’s astonishing how decorum seems to have taken a back seat in today’s online interactions.

What really drove me to write about the perils of modern dating is how vastly different it feels now compared to the 80s and 90s. Back then, dating had a certain simplicity and sincerity that seems lost today. Now, with the internet providing both a shield for people to hide behind and an overwhelming number of options, it feels like many people are reluctant to truly commit, fearing they might miss out on something—or someone—better. It also seems like everyone is afraid of being who they truly are for fear of being either judged or rejected. These paradoxes complicate connections, making the pursuit of anything genuine and meaningful feel much more daunting than I remember from my single days before marriage.

Do you have any other ideas you’d like to write someday?

One writing project that I am focusing on next is completing my novel, Snow Falls on Darkness, which I’ve been developing for quite some time. The story is loosely based on my real-life experience of surviving a relationship with a narcissist who became dangerous after I discovered his infidelity and broke up with him. It delves into the complexities of relationships, the importance of female friendships, and how longevity doesn’t always equate to loyalty. The narrative highlights an unexpected bond formed between women from different backgrounds—an African American female lead and a white woman seeking help to escape her toxic marriage to that same man. It’s a story I believe needs to be told, and I hope it resonates with many. You can find the prologue to the story at http://snowfallsondarkness.blogspot.com.

In addition to completing my next novel, I’m fleshing out a book of poetry and another novel I started some time ago that’s tentatively titled The Marilyn Monroe Syndrome. This story follows a woman into her golden years who explores the idea of having multiple men in her life for various purposes (most of them nonsexual), reflecting on Ms. Monroe’s belief that no one man can fulfil all the qualities a woman seeks to have in a successful relationship with a man. I’m particularly looking forward to interviewing a vibrant 80+ year-old woman in North Carolina who has lived this dynamic since the passing of her second husband; I can’t wait to learn about her insights on this intriguing concept!

Which series or films do you think people who would like your book watch? Is your book similar to something they’d already recognize?

While there isn’t a specific series, film, or book that closely resembles Ghost Protocol: Dating in the New Millennium, I believe readers who enjoy relatable narratives about everyday life and relationships will appreciate my work. I intentionally steer clear of stereotypes and the typical overdone African American tropes; instead, my characters are just like you and me, facing universal struggles such as communication and connection. This focus on authentic experiences makes the story relatable to a diverse audience, allowing them to see themselves in the characters’ journeys.

You currently reside in Dallas, TX. Did that have any influence on what you wrote in the book?

While I believe the experiences highlighted in Ghost Protocol: Dating in the New Millennium are universal themes, Atlanta, Georgia, serves as the backdrop for the stories in this book. It’s often stated that Atlanta has a notably imbalanced ratio of eligible women to men especially in the African American community, which adds a unique context to the narratives of my stories. From ghosting to catfishing, this book delves into the ups and downs of relationships in the digital age, offering insights and perspectives that I hope will resonate with readers everywhere, including those in Dallas, TX and beyond.

What made you choose the title Ghost Protocol: Dating in the New Millenium?

I chose the title Ghost Protocol: Dating in the New Millennium because it perfectly captures that Urban Dictionary definition of ghosting — “when a person is seen as not being fully present in their dealings and communications with other people.” It’s like everyone’s playing hide and seek, but without the seeking part! The term “protocol” adds a dash of humor to this deliberate process of avoiding conflict and communication, like we’re all part of an unwritten rulebook on how to disappear. I think I just invented a new diagnosis — Ghost Protocol Syndrome! Haha! It is both fascinating and frustrating how in a world where we have more ways to connect than ever, we often end up feeling more disconnected. It’s like we’ve got smartphones but lack the heart-signal strength for a true connection!

Which other writers and books do you enjoy?

I have a deep love for many great African American authors that I studied in college and continue to read, such as Toni Morrison, Alice Walker, Maya Angelou, Zora Neale Hurston, James Baldwin, and Frederick Douglass — there are so many more! I also enjoy works by Neale Donald Walsch, Richard Bach, Dan Brown, Robert Ludlum, Dean Koontz, Stephen King, and J.K. Rowling. I’m drawn to stories and ideas that open the mind to new possibilities and perspectives, especially unique character journeys that break the mold, as well as narratives rooted in reality, such as the mysteries throughout humanity’s history that leave you questioning their truth and the conspiracies surrounding them.

Interested in more? This book will be available on November 23rd, 2024 in e-book and paperback! Stay tuned for the pre-order link, plus a chance to win prizes!

The Starlight Contingency Release Day

Cover art by Susan H. Roddey

It’s finally here!

That’s right, the first entry in my trilogy with Falstaff Books is out today! Make sure you grab yourself a copy and save it to Goodreads or LibraryThing!

The Starlight Contingency is Titan AE meets Nikita!

Orphaned siblings Scarlett and Duke Nam have had it rough. Cast aside by society, they’ve managed to stay afloat by being thieves on the streets of Alexandria, Virginia. Things plunge straight to Hell when a heist goes wrong and they’re on the run from the cops, but after they stumble into a nearby home to escape, something seemingly impossible happens – the house transforms into a spaceship and leaves the Earth’s orbit.

Scarlett and Duke awaken to find that they are now prisoners about the Titan International Spaceship. The Earth has been destroyed by the Bergleute des Todes, aka The Miners of Death. Scarlett and Duke are given the chance to become soldiers to fight the aliens who destroyed their world.

The only thing left for them is the hardest thing of all: Survival.

Excerpt 1

Excerpt 2

Excerpt 3

Buy it now in ebook or paperback (with free shipping!) from Falstaff or you can get it on Amazon, Barnes and Noble, and don’t forget to spread the word! More news to come soon, so watch this space.

Your friendly neighborhood author,

Kyoko M.

The Starlight Contingency Excerpt #3

Cover art by Susan H. Roddey

TOMORROW~!

Are you excited for my upcoming science fiction space travel novel with Falstaff Books? Get ready for the final excerpt below!

Orphaned siblings Scarlett and Duke Nam have had it rough. Cast aside by society, they’ve managed to stay afloat by being thieves on the streets of Alexandria, Virginia. Things plunge straight to Hell when a heist goes wrong and they’re on the run from the cops, but after they stumble into a nearby home to escape, something seemingly impossible happens – the house transforms into a spaceship and leaves the Earth’s orbit.

Scarlett and Duke awaken to find that they are now prisoners about the Titan International Spaceship. The Earth has been destroyed by the Bergleute des Todes, aka The Miners of Death. Scarlett and Duke are given the chance to become soldiers to fight the aliens who destroyed their world.

The only thing left for them is the hardest thing of all: Survival.

Excerpt 1

Excerpt 2

DUKE

I awoke when I heard echoed footsteps. I rolled over on my cot to look at the door. The guard opened it and waved two fingers at me.

“Get up.”

I stood, frowning. “What’s going on?”

“You’re going to be debriefed on the situation. Hands against the wall.”

I obeyed, remaining still as he cuffed me and pushed me out the door. No blindfold this time. I logged that knowledge away for later.

At the other end of the hall, another guard hauled Scarlett out of her cell and a small part of me relaxed upon seeing her. She looked small and cold, but her brown eyes lit up when she spotted me. The guards stayed two steps behind us with their guns drawn, ordering us to walk.

“Where do you think they’re taking us?” she asked me in Korean, her voice low and filled with trepidation. 

“Not sure. It might be more questioning about the Rosewoods or whatever went down last night.”

“Stop talking,” the guard snapped, jabbing me in the back with his gun. I quelled my anger and continued walking. We turned right at the corner of the jail cell and into a stairwell. I could see an elevator nearby, but they didn’t want to risk being in an isolated space with us, so we continued past it. The stairwell’s walls were concrete as well, but the floor was metal. Odd. 

We went up two flights and entered another hallway. Instead of jail cells, there were what appeared to be interrogation rooms. It may have been the ones they questioned us in right after the abduction. There were large glass windows next to the door, and inside were the same white walls as our prison with metal chairs and a table across from a one-way mirror. My suspicions of being abducted by government agents seemed more and more likely. 

They stopped at a room at the end of the hall, and there were two men waiting for us: Captain Hallstead and an older man I had never seen before. He wore an expensive navy suit, and his gray hair was immaculately groomed. They stood in front of a table and two chairs, which the guards instructed us to take. 

Scarlett bristled at the order. “I’d rather stand.”

“Lettie,” I muttered in warning. She glanced at me and sighed, taking her seat. The guards closed the door and stood against the wall behind us. The older man watched the two of us for a handful of seconds before speaking.

“My name is General Bridgewater. I’m the commanding officer of this establishment. I’m told that you are Scarlett and Duke. Is that correct?”

We exchanged glances and then nodded. He continued. “Normally, our organization is under the kill-first-ask-questions-later policy, but recent events have caused us to reconsider this course of action.”

He slid his hands out of his pockets and pressed them against the table, lowering his voice. “However, it would be unwise to take this as a sign of weakness. We are reluctant to kill you, but if necessary, we will. Do you understand me?”

“Sir, yes, sir,” Scarlett said with the utmost sarcasm in her voice. I closed my eyes for a second, resisting the urge to kick her in the shin. 

Bridgewater glanced at her. “You’re the one who’s been giving Captain Hallstead trouble, am I right?”

Scarlett’s eyes flicked to the captain. “Aw, you told him about me?”

He ignored her. “I wouldn’t quite call it trouble, sir.”

“Call it what you will. I like your spirit. I’ve seen many girls like you succeed with that kind of fire, but it won’t work here. Here, you either get with the program or you live a hard life. I can wipe your early transgressions clean if you agree to cooperate for the duration of your stay at this facility. That’s an offer for the both of you.”

“That’s very generous of you,” I said in a measured voice. “But we’d both be much happier if you showed us the door. “

Bridgewater exhaled through his nose, straightening to full height. “There is no door. That’s why we’ve brought you here. You don’t seem to have any more information for us, so it’s time to open Pandora’s box.”

He snapped his fingers. Captain Hallstead stepped forward and placed a manila folder on the table. He opened it, revealing a large photograph.

“Do you know what this is?”

“A satellite. What about it?” I answered. 

“It’s not just any satellite. This is a deep space satellite constructed to explore galaxies that are too far away for us to reach as of yet. It was put into orbit over twenty years ago. It captured photos of an unidentified planet with qualities similar to Earth. We launched a campaign that year to find out if it had breathable air and other natural resources.”

“Yeah, I remember reading about this,” Scarlett said. “They were calling it Earth II. The program was canceled for vague reasons. I’m guessing you know why.”

He slid the picture aside. This time, it wasn’t a satellite. It was something that looked like a giant meteor with spikes coming out of it and an eerie blue glow at the center.

“Earth II was destroyed that same year.”

“By what? This meteor?”

“It’s not a meteor. It’s a ship.”

Both of us went completely still. 

Scarlett spoke first. “Wait, wait, wait. You’re telling us that this thing is an alien spaceship?”

“Yes.”

She chuckled, shaking her head. “That’s great. Fantastic. It’s like we’re in Independence Day. Where are Will Smith and Jeff Goldblum when you need them?”

Captain Hallstead didn’t crack a smile. He kept going. “The ship has a cannon on board that harbors an energy source our scientists call Sorbatium. We believe it’s akin to solar energy, as if they are harnessing small suns. They’ve channeled it into a destructive beam. They fired at Earth II and destroyed it in less than five minutes. The ship then deployed hundreds of smaller vessels to collect the fragments of the planet’s core, which we believe they use for profit.”

“And who is they?” Scarlett asked, still heavy on skepticism. 

“The astrologist who made the discovery was German. He called them the Bergleute des Todes. Miners of death. They travel from planet to planet, destroying them and gathering their core material. We knew it would only be a certain amount of time before they mined all the usable planets in that galaxy and started coming for ours. That’s when the Starlight Contingency was put into motion. We selected one hundred million citizens of Earth to be the continuation of mankind if our military force failed against the Bergleute. In secret, their homes were converted into our most advanced space shuttles and outfitted with equipment for an immediate exit of the solar system. The Rosewoods were part of that one hundred million, but your intervention brings that number up to one hundred million and two.” 

“So what now?” Scarlett interrupted. “We become soldiers in the war against the Bergs? For great justice? Give me a fucking break here. How stupid do you think we are?”

Hallstead’s eyes narrowed a bit. “You really don’t want me to answer that.”

She glared. “Bite me, pretty boy.”

“Is there a point to this conversation?” I interjected, trying to stop their squabbling. 

Hallstead cleared his throat, taking a deep breath. “Last night, the Bergleute made their way into our solar system. We launched a full assault on them. Every single shuttle was destroyed, and not just ours. France, Germany, Russia, Japan, China, Korea…everyone’s. We had no other choice. We launched the Starlight Contingency after the last infantry fell.”

“Then what? You need us so you can launch another attack before they blow up the Earth?”

“You don’t understand. The Earth was destroyed six hours ago.”

My sister couldn’t hold it in anymore. She burst out laughing, loud and unbridled. It took her a moment to get it under control, talking through giggles. “This is amazing. I mean, I’ve never heard such a load of shit in my life. If you want us to work for you, just say so. You didn’t have to come up with such an elaborate ruse.”

General Bridgewater snapped his fingers again, this time at the guards. “Take them topside. Now.”

“Yes, sir.”

The guards hauled us to our feet and shoved us out the door. Captain Hallstead and the general trailed us. This time, we used the elevator instead of the stairs. Both men were relatively certain we wouldn’t try anything in their presence, it seemed. I could attest to this but Scarlett…not so much. She retained a look of bemusement at the serious expressions on everyone’s face. I couldn’t blame her. Their story was laughable and had little evidence to support it. I suspected it was part of a larger scheme of brainwashing. I was vulnerable to many things, but manipulation was seldom one of them. 

We rose for several minutes. My eyebrow started to lift when I noticed we were now in the twenties. The elevator was all metal, no windows, so I couldn’t see the outside. However, the fact that it was about fifteen feet across in both directions certainly roused my suspicion. 

Finally, we hit the thirtieth floor and the doors opened. For a second, I didn’t move. 

It looked like the docking bay of a ship, but not a seafaring ship—a spaceship. 

There were at least thirty different consoles where men and women in dark blue jumpsuits sat wearing headsets and monitoring digital screens. 

Captain Hallstead and General Bridgewater walked in, and the guards nudged my sister and I forward. By now, the skeptical expression on Scarlett’s face had subsided and she began to look unnerved. 

The two men walked to the front of the deck, and we followed, staring at the sight before us. General Bridgewater brandished a hand at everything before us.

“Welcome to the Titan.”

There were windows at least twenty feet high in front of us, and beyond them was a sky so black that it felt like night itself stretched across my vision. There was only one thing breaking up the blanket of darkness. To the right, I could see the atmosphere of a moon of some sort—its surface a pale orange. I had never seen anything like it. Stars sparkled out in the distance, but none of it looked familiar. These were not our stars. I had seen them as a child, studying charts in my science classes and naming their patterns while my mother hovered over me, smiling. 

“Hey, Duke,” Scarlett said next to me in an alarmingly detached sort of voice. 

“Yeah?” I whispered.

“This looks kind of…real.”

“Yeah.”

“Okay. I thought it was just me.”

Then Scarlett went limp and started to fall. The guards reached for her, but Captain Hallstead caught her with an expression on his face between surprise and pity. She had actually fainted. Not that I blamed her. The blood had retreated from my face, and I could feel dread filling my stomach like cold poison. 

“Take her to the infirmary,” General Bridgewater said impassively. “Let me know when she revives.” He might have been used to seeing reactions like this, especially if this wasn’t an illusion. 

Captain Hallstead handed my sister over to one of the guards, his eyes lingering as the man carried her out. I tried to read his expression, but it was like taking impression from stone: flat, lifeless, cold. But there was something there. I just didn’t know what. 

“Do you have any questions, son?” 

I glanced up at General Bridgewater and had to swallow before I could answer. Even then, my voice wavered. “Do you have…footage of Earth’s destruction? I’ll admit that I am starting to believe you, but this could still be some sort of elaborate ruse.”

The general turned and motioned to a wide circular console different from the ones the crewmembers were using. He touched his fingertip to the surface, and an enormous 3D digital map appeared. Briefly, I saw the coordinates for where we were in space and then he switched to a feed from a satellite.

“This is the last footage we received before it happened. It’s from one of our satellites. I’m sure other countries have their own versions of it as well. By the time the Bergleute entered the solar system, the ships including the Starlight Contingency had already evacuated the Earth.”

The satellite showed the surface of the Earth as I always remembered it—seeming to hang in the darkness of space like a sapphire. The upper corner of the globe began to darken, confusing me until I realized it was a shadow from the alien cruiser. The satellite wasn’t facing it so I couldn’t catch a glimpse, but I knew it was there. I saw a bright flash and then a red beam burrowed into one side of the planet. My stomach jerked inside me at the sight of the land crumbling and the seas boiling in its wake. It had disintegrated part of Asia already, and there were burning waves climbing outward from the entry point. After a few minutes, the beam burst out the other side of the planet and the tectonic plates of the Earth’s surface began to crack apart. Bright yellow and orange spurted from the cracks, evidence of the planet’s core peeking through as the weapon ripped it apart from the inside. At last, it exploded, and the satellite feed went to static. 

General Bridgewater closed the feed. He showed no emotion at seeing it. I got the feeling he had watched it a hundred times, his pale eyes filling the world just before it turned into nothing more than rocks and dust. 

“General Bridgewater,” I said. “If this is some sort of trick, understand that I will do everything in my power to end your life.”

He nodded. I wiped my eyes and straightened my posture. “Then consider this my agreement to cooperate with your operation. I can’t say the same thing for my sister, but I will do what is needed as long as I am on this vessel.”

“Good man. Escort him to the barracks.”

The guard reached for me, but I held up my hands. “What is going to happen to Scarlett?”

General Bridgewater glanced at Captain Hallstead, and he answered instead. “She needs to be examined for psychological damage, and if she chooses to play ball, she’ll be placed in the women’s division aboard this ship. You’re both going to become soldiers.”

“I need to be able to see her. She won’t recover as quickly without me.”

Captain Hallstead paused, seeming unsure. “We’ll see if we can make arrangements, but as of now she won’t be released until we’re sure she’s stable. A lot of people suffer from PTSD after seeing the world destroyed. We’ll keep her safe.”

I stepped forward, unafraid. “I want your word on that, Captain.”

He met my eyes. “You have my word.”

I let the guard take me back to the elevator and lead me to my new home. The only home I had left. 

God help us. 

TO BE CONTINUED IN THE STARLIGHT CONTINGENCY

Pre-order at Falstaff Books now! You can get it via Amazon as well. Please also add it to your Goodreads TBR shelf. Stay tuned for more news!

The Starlight Contingency Excerpt #2

Cover art by Susan H. Roddey

We’re getting closer to our release date, so here’s an all-new excerpt from my upcoming science fiction space travel novel with Falstaff Books, The Starlight Contingency #1! If you haven’t already read the opening chapter in the first excerpt, go here first, and then catch up.

The Starlight Contingency is Titan AE meets Nikita!

Orphaned siblings Scarlett and Duke Nam have had it rough. Cast aside by society, they’ve managed to stay afloat by being thieves on the streets of Alexandria, Virginia. Things plunge straight to Hell when a heist goes wrong and they’re on the run from the cops, but after they stumble into a nearby home to escape, something seemingly impossible happens – the house transforms into a spaceship and leaves the Earth’s orbit.

Scarlett and Duke awaken to find that they are now prisoners about the Titan International Spaceship. The Earth has been destroyed by the Bergleute des Todes, aka The Miners of Death. Scarlett and Duke are given the chance to become soldiers to fight the aliens who destroyed their world.

The only thing left for them is the hardest thing of all: Survival.

Release date: October 29th, 2024

Pre-order now on Falstaff Books!

SCARLETT

I woke up on the floor. It was colder than ice, colder than the Arctic Circle, colder than a penguin’s ass. Thankfully, my wrists and ankles were no longer in handcuffs, but my head was splitting. Nausea rolled through me in a sickening wave. It took a few minutes for it to pass and that was when I opened my eyes.

The room was white. The walls, the floor, the ceiling, were all blindingly white. I closed my eyes again and pushed up on my hands as slowly as possible. My arms felt like they were gonna fold under me at any second. The room was only about ten feet across, from what I could tell with my blurry vision.

I sat up and my back hit something solid. I glanced behind me to see a plain green cot, a white pillow, and a blue blanket. And when I turned my head to the left, I saw a man in black leaning against the metal bars on the far wall.

I scrambled backward on my hands and knees. The man shook his head and spoke with a smoky voice.

“Don’t get up too fast. You’ll—”

I stood up, walked two steps, and vomited in the corner of the room. My entire body shook, and the headache got worse. It felt like my brain was vibrating inside my skull.

“Told you so.”

I wiped my mouth clean and glared at him. “Who the fuck are you?”

My vision cleared somewhat, and I could see him properly. He was white, late twenties, tall, gray eyes, brown hair, goatee, wearing an expensive black suit, tie, and dress shoes. His hands were in his pockets as he watched me.

“Travis Hallstead,” he said. “Not that I owe you anything.”

“You owe me an explanation,” I sneered, trying once more to stand up. This time, I didn’t puke and my legs held.

He narrowed his eyes at me. “So do you.”

I snorted. “Don’t tell me. You’re gonna ask me about the Star Wars Contingency.”

“It’s the Starlight Contingency,” Travis corrected. “And yeah, I was.”

“I’ll tell you like I told the last guy. I don’t know what the fuck that is and I don’t care. Where is my brother? Where are we?”

He shook his head, smirking. “You’re a hard ass, I’ll give you that. But that’s not gonna get you what you want. If you play ball, maybe you won’t spend the rest of your life rotting in this cell and all the charm and anger in the world won’t get you out.”

I walked closer, my mouth set in a firm line. He pushed off from the wall, staring me down without an ounce of fear.

“I’m gonna ask you one last time, Mr. Travis Hallstead. Where…is…my…brother?” I enunciated each word with a venomous tone.

“That’s the least of your worries right now, trust me.”

“Wrong answer.” I threw a punch at him.

He ducked and grabbed my wrist, throwing me against the wall behind him. “You really don’t wanna do this, little girl.”

“Fuck you!” I threw another punch, two more, but he dodged them, stepping back so that they went right past his nose. I switched to low jabs, trying to hit him in the stomach, but he blocked them each time with liquid-fast reflexes. This man was trained, and well. There was no way I could beat him with my fighting skills. But that didn’t mean I wasn’t gonna try.

I faked a haymaker that made him sidestep, and the back of his legs hit the cot, giving me a couple seconds to move. I shoved him and he fell back onto the cot. I grabbed his tie and yanked him up so that he dangled there awkwardly, raising my right fist.

“Tell me where my brother is or I’ll pound that goatee right off your pretty face,” I growled.

To my surprise, he offered me a slick grin and then punched me in the right kidney, making me let go of the tie. I fell forward onto his lap, and he grabbed my arms, crossing them over my chest so that I couldn’t move.

“You done?” Travis asked in an infuriatingly calm voice.

I struggled, but his grip was like iron. I couldn’t move backward out of his lap or to the side, which made me even angrier. “Not by a long shot.”

“Well, as much as I’ve enjoyed playing with you,” he replied in a sharp, sarcastic tone, “you need more time to cool off and think about your priorities.”

“Oh, I’ve got those straight. Kick your ass, get out of this cell, get my brother, and get the hell out of here.”

He shook his head. “You don’t get it. There is no ‘out of here.’ Like it or not, this place is all you have left now. It’s what we all have left.”

“What are you talking about?”

His dark eyes searched mine for a long moment and then a look of interest spilled through them. He tilted his head a bit, frowning. “You really don’t know, do you?”

“How many times have I said that already? I don’t know what happened before we blacked out. We were in the Rosewoods’ mansion and then everything started shaking and then we passed out. That’s all I know. Nothing else.”

His hands loosened on my wrists. “Why were you in their mansion?”

“We…” I bit my bottom lip, choosing my words carefully. “…were on the run. We needed a place to hide and that’s where we hid. They weren’t our targets—they were just convenient. Nothing more.”

His grip tightened to the bruising point. “You’re lying again.”

“I’m not lying,” I snapped. “What do you want me to say? The Rosewoods aren’t dead, right? If we had been sent to kill them, then we would have known about their freaky steel doors and magic house vibrator and crazy grandma—”

His eyes widened. “You spoke to Evelyn Rosewood?”

“Briefly. She was just babbling. I figured she was senile.”

“What did she babble about?”

“Something about us being chosen, that there was someone waiting in the darkness.”

Another look went through his eyes—not fear, but maybe a cousin of the feeling mixed with genuine surprise. Before I could ask him about it, he spoke again. “Last thing—what’s your name?”

I eyed him. “Who wants to know?”

His fingers finally went slack around my arms and a ghost of a smile returned to his lips.

“Me.”

I stared at him. I couldn’t really lose anything by answering him. I was already in a prison. Things couldn’t get much worse than that, by my account.

“Scarlett. With two t’s.”

He glanced at the two streaks of bright red hair at my temple. “Changed your name to fit your hairstyle?”

I smiled. “No, but I get that a lot. It’s after my birthmark.”

His eyes immediately started searching for a blemish on my skin. “Birthmark? Where?”

My smile stretched. “Not on a first date, Mr. Hallstead. Though I think we’re about halfway there anyway.”

He then noticed I had been sitting in his lap this entire time and let me up. I flopped against the cot as he stood, letting the humor drain out of me. “I answered your questions, now answer mine.”

Travis dusted off his suit and adjusted his tie, then regarded me with a serious look.

“Your brother is being detained and questioned in this facility as well. It’s unlikely that the two of you will see each other again any time soon.”

His words scared me to my very core. I took a deep breath to calm myself. “Who are you? CIA? FBI? NSA? Division?”

“It doesn’t matter. The point is that if your brother corroborates your story, you might have options, but as of now, you’re to remain a prisoner.”

“For how long?”

He said nothing, only rapping his knuckles against the metal door to his right. A guard dressed in black body armor walked over and unlocked the jail cell, letting him out. He left.

I pulled my legs up to my chest, blanketed in total silence.

“…where do I pee?”

TO BE CONTINUED IN THE STARLIGHT CONTINGENCY

You can get it in ebook or paperback on Falstaff or Amazon!

Excerpt #3 is also now available to read for free! Add the book to your Goodreads shelf in the meantime! Stay tuned for more excerpts and other author-related things from Kyoko M!

                                                                        *

The Starlight Contingency Excerpt #1

Cover art by Susan H. Roddey

ICYMI, my upcoming science fiction space travel novel, The Starlight Contingency #1, has a cover and synopsis, so now it’s time for your first taste of the adventure!

The Starlight Contingency is Titan AE meets Nikita!

Orphaned siblings Scarlett and Duke Nam have had it rough. Cast aside by society, they’ve managed to stay afloat by being thieves on the streets of Alexandria, Virginia. Things plunge straight to Hell when a heist goes wrong and they’re on the run from the cops, but after they stumble into a nearby home to escape, something seemingly impossible happens – the house transforms into a spaceship and leaves the Earth’s orbit.

Scarlett and Duke awaken to find that they are now prisoners about the Titan International Spaceship. The Earth has been destroyed by the Bergleute des Todes, aka The Miners of Death. Scarlett and Duke are given the chance to become soldiers to fight the aliens who destroyed their world.

The only thing left for them is the hardest thing of all: Survival.

Please enjoy the below excerpt!

DUKE

The binoculars in my hands were stolen.

Stealing wasn’t hard. The clerk had been swamped on a Saturday night when it was still warm and people populated the street like schools of fish. Besides, Scarlett was perfect for distraction if he hadn’t been anyway. The process is simple, almost childishly simple. Scope out the shop two days ahead of time. Mind the cameras. Browse. Remain casual. Ask the clerk questions about the products, make it look like you’re gonna make a purchase. Clerks think that shoplifters avoid eye contact and immediately head for the corners of the store. Those are the amateurs. The kids looking for cheap thrills. The poor single moms struggling to make ends meet. The pathological liars.

We weren’t like them.

A leather jacket would be too obvious. Cargo pants too. My favorite was a pair of old, ratty jeans that hung low off my ass. The clerk was a straight guy, so he wouldn’t be paying attention to my ass when I carefully slipped the binoculars inside the back pocket after skillfully removing the tag with my pocketknife. 3.2 seconds. I had it down to an art.

I’d met eyes with Scarlett, and she knew the deed was done. We weren’t twins, but people thought we were because we had so many non-verbal cues. Thieving wasn’t like in the movies. We didn’t have elaborate schemes and escape plans. We didn’t wear rubber masks with nuns or presidents on them. Though, we did wear all black at night robberies. That was actually pretty useful.

My mind reeled itself back in to the task at hand. We had been planning this haul for a month. No more petty crooks. Big leagues. But more money also meant more time in jail and so we had to be careful. Cautious. Smart. Direct.

“Traffic?”

“Nothing. It is three a.m., after all.” Scarlett stuck out her hand for the binoculars. I handed them to her and lowered my hands to the belt. The darkness of the alley concealed us. I didn’t need light. I felt the tools one by one with my fingertips to check that they were all there and breathed a sigh of relief. Things would be fine. Just fine.

“Alright, let’s cross. Head low, casual.”

“Yes, boss,” she snorted, tucking the binoculars on her belt. I walked across the street first, scanning for cars or people. It was a cold October night, and no one was around. I liked it that way, even when we weren’t working. The rear entrance to the privately owned jewelry store—embarrassingly cliché, I know—was directly across from a pet store, which provided us with cover. No cameras on this street, but there were some two stoplights down, which was why we were on foot tonight.

Scarlett came over a couple minutes after me. I pried the rear entrance open, having already turned off the alarms. That was why we’d chosen this place. Large chain jewelry stores had intricate security systems that couldn’t be externally shut down even in the event the power went out. We’d cased the place last month, getting to know the owner and the staff, and we’d worked out that it was minimum security and, therefore, worth the risk.

Cold silence and shiny linoleum greeted me. I walked inside, holding the door for my sister. I motioned for her to put her ski mask on and then did so myself. I shut the door and locked it before doing a quick scan of the employee lounge. Everything was laid out just like Scarlett said. Perfect.

There were a lot of ways to crack a safe, but we had found the fastest method was using a handheld welding torch. The modern safe of a place like this one wasn’t spectacular. It sat in the corner of the room. Like most retail stores, there wouldn’t be a sizeable amount of cash inside because most customers paid by card or check and the employees made weekly drops to the bank, but some bills were better than none. But that wasn’t all we were here for anyway.

Scarlett burned through the metal door of the safe and flicked the welding torch off, her gloved fingers tugging at the mostly melted lid to reveal the drawer inside. I unfolded a bag and dumped the drawers from the cash registers inside, calculating that we had maybe two-thousand dollars in cash. Not bad.

The next priority was the loose diamonds, which were kept in a separate container with labels for where they went in the displays. This was the real reason we’d come. The private owner had a handful that amounted to about fifty-to-sixty grand altogether. I’d had a friend in our apartment building who said he could find a fence for the diamonds. All they needed to do was make sure there weren’t serial numbers etched inside them and we’d be home free.

We walked out of the back room to the front display and split up. She went to the far side of the shop near the window, staying low, and I worked on the alarms set up on each display case. Once they were open, I stuffed the important pieces in individual sacks: necklaces first, bracelets second, and rings last. Anything else wouldn’t be worth the trouble because we only had another two minutes to get the hell out of dodge. Scarlett always called me a Five-Minute Man. I found that both disturbing and irritating, but it was still better than my usual nickname.

I lifted my eyes toward her to let her know I had finished my half, but then I saw it: sleek and shiny like a Great White cruising through the surf, aching for prey. My mouth felt as if it had been filled with sand, but I pushed the words out anyway.

“Lettie, drop!” I hissed as the cop car glided past the window. She hit the floor with a loud thunk,and I did as well, panting for air as panic gripped my chest. I froze, listening for the sound of the tires scraping against the road but heard nothing. Slowly, I tilted my head upward to see the cop car had stopped in front of the building. I caught a glimpse of two patrol officers climbing out and one of them touching his walkie talkie. As soon as both of them shut the doors to their car, I hollered at my sister.

“Go!”

Scarlett leapt to her feet and raced toward me. The officers spotted us and broke into a run. I slung the loot across my shoulder and led the way out of the shop, kicking the door open once I’d slid the lock back. Our feet punished the ground, but it wasn’t enough. I could hear the unintelligible jabber of their radio as they called in the robbery and ran even faster, turning down alleys left and right until we reached our escape route. Three streets and then straight into the woods. Five minutes and we’d be out of here.

Car horns blared as we pounced into the street. Scarlett had to do a front-hand flip over the hood of one that didn’t stop in time. Sirens cut through the air, meaning that the cops had a second unit nearby, further mucking up our plans. The ski mask stifled my heaving breaths. I wanted desperately to take it off as we crossed the second street, climbing over stone dividers across the freeway.

We reached the last and most dangerous road and had to stop as an eighteen-wheeler thundered past. My foot hit the concrete and then everything flashed white for a second. At first, I thought I’d been hit by a car and died, but then I heard the unmistakable roar of helicopter blades and squinted up into the sky to see a police copter.

“Are you fucking kidding me?!” my sister spat, reading my mind.

I jerked my head in the direction of the forest. “Keep going!”

We crossed the last street and dove into the woods, eluding the spotlight for a few precious moments by hiding beneath a rotting log. Dirt and loam clung to my ski mask, making it even harder to breathe, and mud clumped on the front of my pants. We flattened ourselves as much as possible as the copter continued searching for us in the dark, but I knew we couldn’t stay there. I could see the pair of cops who had spotted us crossing the second street. They would find us in mere minutes.

“This wasn’t part of the plan,” Scarlett hissed, her brown eyes slicing into mine.

“I know,” I snapped. “Will you just give me a second to think?”

“Sure. You take your second and the cops crawl up our asses. Where did they even get a chopper? How are we this unlucky?”

“No one gets away with everything.” I craned my neck to peer at the forest behind us, trying to remember where it led. Then it hit me.

“The Rosewood mansion.”

Scarlett stared at me. “You’re kidding me, right?”

“They haven’t spotted us yet. If we make a break for it, we should be able to get on the grounds before they see where we went.”

“Duke, we don’t know what’s in there. We don’t know how their security system works. For all we know, they have attack dogs with lasers on their heads!”

“We move on the count of three.”

She swore at me, pointing a long finger in my face. “Duke, this is a stupid idea.”

“One…”

“We’re gonna get caught!”

“Two…”

“If you say three, I’ll punch you in the nuts.”

“Three!”

I jumped to my feet and bolted. Scarlett let out an unearthly growl and came tearing after me. Branches smacked my chest, leaves scattered beneath my feet, and the cold air made my eyes tear up, but I kept going until the sound of sticks crunching and my ragged breath were all I could hear. A soundtrack of desperation and the need for freedom. A snide little voice in the back of my head told me it was pointless, that we’d get caught and locked up, but I didn’t listen. Maybe God had one trick left up His sleeve and He’d slide it to me under the table.

The Rosewood mansion was surrounded by a four-foot brick wall with black fencing atop it. Lanterns adorned the front gate, giving me a point to focus on as we ran. Not that we were going to use it. One does not simply walk into Mordor, nor does one simply waltz into one of the most expensive homes in the state of Virginia.

My lungs ached and my hands shook as I hoisted my sister up over the fence in the back yard, straining to hear where the helicopter had gone. I saw dashes of light in the forest and followed the skyline until I spotted the flying mammoth thirsty for our capture. Briefly, I wondered if there were families at home eating buckets of popcorn and watching us like we were the circus, their entertainment for the night. They were programmed to hate us, the bad guys, the criminals, the scumbags. Bastards.

Thankfully, no attacks dogs with lasers on their heads greeted us as we hurried uphill toward the mansion. We might have tripped a silent alarm triggered by cameras, but I hadn’t seen any wiring in the fences to indicate otherwise. It was possible that the mansion itself was wired instead of the premises.

The spotlight hit the grass four feet away from us, and I shoved my sister forward, pointing to the wooden porch connected to the third floor. We scurried over to it and flattened ourselves against the wall, praying that they hadn’t seen us yet. The light veered back and forth on the ground like a drunk driver, drifting closer, making my heartbeat drown out the sound of the helicopter blades beating in the air. It passed over the porch, and the slats let in some of the blinding light, shocking my dilated pupils to tiny stars. Then, mercifully, it vanished.

Scarlett’s shoulder bumped mine as she slumped down, her chest heaving as she tried to catch her breath enough to make a smartass comment.

“Well, wasn’t that fun?”

“Exceptionally,” I replied, yanking the horrid ski mask off my face and mopping up the sweat dripping down my skin. Once clean, I pulled it back on and crooked a finger at her.

“The cops will be searching the premises in no time. Let’s get inside and get supplies so we can move on.”

Nodding, she pressed her face to the plate-glass window of the first floor. I watched as she scanned what she could see of their kitchen.

“What kind of system?”

“A damn good one,” she admitted, flipping her black hair over one shoulder. The ponytail had come loose during our escape. She’d have to tuck it under the mask, which she hated to do.

“From what I can see, there’s a security pad on all the doors. Cutting the power might give us enough time for a hit-it-and-quit it, but not much else. The alarm system might be on a separate power source.”

“We’ll have to risk it. We’ve got to get out of here before the cops come. Let’s just hope none of the Rosewoods are night owls.”

I took out my flashlight and crept around the long brick wall, searching for the power line. It was about three feet behind the porch, nestled just out of range of the garden and the tree line. I reached into the last pocket on the left side of my belt, lamenting that I’d have to use a miniature charge. These things weren’t cheap, and I’d only gotten three of them over the course of the past year. Emergencies only. But I’d be damned if this wasn’t an emergency.

“Spot me,” I said, sticking the flashlight back into my pocket and climbing up the pole. This was private property, so the pole had thin metal sticking out to serve as steps for maintenance purposes. I ascended as quickly as possible, occasionally checking for the helicopter’s current position, and then withdrew the flashlight and charge.

I stuck the small explosive on the transformer between the lines leading toward the mansion. It would shut the power off, then the backup generator would kick in and reset the security system, but we’d already be inside. I set the charge and climbed down, motioning for Scarlett to follow me beneath the porch for safety. We both plugged our ears just before a muted pop crackled through the back yard, punctuated by sparks and a bright flash. Power out.

Scarlett went to the sliding glass door and flashed a nervous look in my direction. I nodded once. She picked the lock and gingerly slid the door back as I held my breath. Silence. Thank God.

She crept inside and I followed, closing the door and pulling the curtains shut. We both stood still, breathing lightly in unison, ears straining to hear any commotion in the house. I estimated that there were probably six rooms on this floor, maybe more in the basement. The main goal was to get a set of wheels, meaning that we were heading for the garage on the other side of the compound. The cops would be looking for people on foot, not in a vehicle, until they found out that we’d broken into the mansion, and by then, it would be too late.

I found a knife rack on the counter and took two of them. Scarlett took three of the smaller ones. Neither of us intended to kill or maim anyone, but they were good for intimidation.

I held the long knife in my left hand as I started past the den and down the hallway, mindful of every creak of the hardwood floor. There were four closed doors on either side. I stared at them, keeping my steps as light as possible. They looked like gigantic mouths waiting to swallow us whole.

We were past three of them when I heard an unmistakable click of a light switch. I whirled to see the light at the end of the hall was on and heard a doorknob turn. Two choices: run or hide.

Cursing, I opened the door to my right and waved Scarlett in. We darted inside and closed it, praying no one heard us. I pressed my ear to the door, listening. No footsteps. I couldn’t tell if that was good or bad.

“Duke,” Scarlett whispered, but I shushed her. She grabbed my arm and squeezed, saying my name again.

I glared at her. “I can’t hear. What are you—?”

She was looking at the bed. I shut my mouth, my throat going dry as I realized there was an elderly black woman sitting there, staring at us.

She was short and plump with long white dreadlocks tucked in a messy bun at her nape. She wore a plain, light blue nightgown, her feet bare, the bed unmade from where she’d been lying in it. There was a cane leaning against the nightstand and a pair of slippers nearby.

Immediately, I lowered the knife to my side and held out my other hand toward her. “Ma’am, I need you to stay calm. We’re not going to hurt you. We just need a car and we’ll be out of here, I swear.”

“They’re waiting to take us,” the old woman said.

I glanced at Scarlett. She shrugged. I kept my voice low as I addressed the woman. “What?”

“Waiting and waiting. Long time. Cold, where they are. Dark too. It’s all they know.”

Her voice was soft and trembling, but the Jamaican accent made it sound cryptic. The darkness made it hard to tell, but she looked to be nearly eighty years old. No wonder her mind had gone. She didn’t seem upset by our presence. It almost felt like she had been expecting us.

Scarlett spoke up this time. “Ma’am, where is the garage on this property? Is it connected to the house?”

The old woman put her bare feet on the floor and walked toward my sister. Scarlett tensed, not sure of her intentions, but the old woman lifted her frail hands and touched her hair—ran her fingers down the black satin and the steaks of red at my sister’s forehead.

“Chosen, you two. Never thought I’d see the day.”

Scarlett glanced at me. “What the hell is she talking about?”

I opened my mouth to reply, but then a screeching sound tore through the silence like a knife through a veil. I clapped my hands over my ears, nearly keeling over at the volume of the alarm. It was unlike anything I’d ever heard—louder than ambulance sirens, louder than police sirens, damn near louder than God Himself.

“What is that?” Scarlett shouted, panicking.

I shook my head. “I don’t know! Just hide! Now!”

I ran to the closet and pulled the double doors back, stuffing myself inside next to the fur coats and silk pajamas. Through the slats, I could see Scarlett flattening herself on the carpet and crawling beneath the bed. The old woman didn’t move from her spot as if she were deaf, staring at the door as if expecting something.

Seconds later, a bald black man in his fifties opened the door and spotted her, wrapping his large hands around her forearms.

“C’mon, Mama, we’ve got to get ready.”

He pulled her into the hallway and disappeared. What the hell was going on? Why were they leaving? Had the police notified them of our presence?

I could hear some sort of commotion from the hallway—panicked voices, footsteps, the clamor of dishes hitting the floor—the urge to run increased tenfold. I closed my eyes and counted to ten, trying to slow my heartbeat, but my pulse wouldn’t cooperate. It beat hard and fast in my throat, along my tongue like the salty flavor of sweat, clinging. I couldn’t think with this damn alarm slamming against my eardrums, plowing the sanity from my skull.

The carpet beneath my muddy boots started to vibrate. At first, I thought it was because of the alarms, but when I knelt and pressed my gloved hand to the ground, I knew it wasn’t them. It rumbled like thunder had been trapped underneath the house. What the hell was going on?

The rumbling abruptly changed to shaking, unlike anything I had ever experienced. I pressed my hand to the wall on my left, trying to stay on my feet as the quaking worsened and shoes began falling off the shelf over my head. An earthquake in Alexandria, Virginia? Impossible.

The alarms and the falling shoes almost blocked out the sound of something outside of the house clicking and whirring like the innards of a clock. I stumbled back over to the closet doors to see the window on the far wall, ignoring the painful bumps on the head from boxes sliding off the shelf as I saw something amazing.

Huge metal panels shot up from below and clicked into place over the window, swallowing me in complete darkness.

The house was…transforming.

It didn’t matter if we got caught any more. We had to get out of here. I shoved the closet doors open and turned on my flashlight. Scarlett crawled out from beneath the bed, her eyes red and wet with fearful tears. I pulled her to her feet, my voice nearly giving out because I had to shout so loud.

“We have to get out of here. Come on!”

I went for the door, which had slammed shut after the man and old woman left, but it wouldn’t open. I pushed my sister back and kicked the doorjamb once, twice, a third time, but it didn’t budge. Scarlett joined me, kicking in unison at the white oak until it splintered. I stuck my hand in the hole we’d made over the doorknob and ripped a chunk of the wood out. The flashlight shook in my hands as metal glinted out from beneath the wood.

Solid steel. Escape was impossible.

We stared at each other, the light allowing me only a glimpse of her face, but I knew our expressions were the same. End of the line.

I wrapped my arms around her and knelt, kissing the top of her head.

“I’m sorry, Lettie. I’m so sorry,” I whispered hoarsely, hot tears tracing the lines of my cheeks as the quaking and clicking and screaming alarms worsened.

An explosion rocked beneath the house, and before I blacked out, I felt one sensation.

Flying.

TO BE CONTINUED IN THE STARLIGHT CONTINGENCY #1!

Release date: October 29th, 2024

Pre-order now for only $4 on the Falstaff website or from Amazon and you can also get it with free shipping directly from Falstaff Books! There is also now a second excerpt and a third one to read too! Stay tuned for more excerpts and other goodies!

The Starlight Contingency #1 Cover Reveal and Synopsis (Falstaff Books)

IT’S FINALLY HERE, Y’ALL.

Cover by Susan H. Roddey
Cover by Susan H. Roddey

Orphaned siblings Scarlett and Duke Nam have had it rough. Cast aside by society, they’ve managed to stay afloat by being thieves on the streets of Alexandria, Virginia. Things plunge straight to Hell when a heist goes wrong and they’re on the run from the cops, but after they stumble into a nearby home to escape, something seemingly impossible happens – the house transforms into a spaceship and leaves the Earth’s orbit.

Scarlett and Duke awaken to find that they are now prisoners about the Titan International Spaceship. the Earth has been destroyed by the Bergleute des Todes, aka The Miners of Death. Scarlett and Duke are given the chance to become soldiers to fight the aliens who destroyed their world.

The only thing left for them is the hardest thing of all: Survival.

Release date: October 29th, 2024

Pre-order now on Falstaff Books! You can also get it via Amazon in ebook and paperback.

Add it to your Goodreads shelf as well and be on the lookout for more announcements and excerpts soon!

Multiverse Con 2024 Schedule

Hey, everyone! I am pleased to announce that this is my tentative schedule for the upcoming Multiverse Con in Peachtree City, GA! Looking forward to seeing everyone. If you’re in GA and would like to stop by my table and say hi, here are all the details: https://www.multiversecon.org/

Atlanta Writers Club Lecture

Hey, all! I have been invited to speak at the upcoming meeting for the Atlanta Writers Club in Lilburn, GA! I will be doing a lecture about self-publishing and hybrid publishing as well as talking marketing and advertising techniques. I’d love for you to join me if you’re in the area. You can find all the information you need right here: https://atlantawritersclub.org/upcoming-meeting/

Lecture: 3pm

Book signing: 4pm

Address: 4817 Church Street, Lilburn, GA 30047-6827

See you there, everyone!